Not Just Another Day in the Office
by Serene Ice Dragon
Summary: Life as a Shinigami isn't all paperwork and cases. A collection of one-shots of various genres.
1. Walls

_**Summary:** Ever since he was a child, Hisoka has built walls around himself in order to protect himself, but what happens when somebody unexpectedly slips through his barriers? Hisoka's thoughts about first meeting Tsuzuki._

_**Rating:** K+_

_**Genre:** Angst/Hurt/Comfort_

_**Character:** Hisoka Kurosaki  
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_**Words:** 1,737_

_**Author's Note:** This was originally written as a songfic, but since songfics are not allowed, I've rewritten it so that no lyrics are included and the story is entirely my own (other than the obvious fact I do not own Yami no Matsuei or its characters). Inspired by the song "Afraid This Time" by Celldweller.  
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Even at a young age, Hisoka had learned to build walls around himself. It was necessary if he wanted to keep any scrap of emotional and mental health. Since the first time his mother realized he had strong empathetic abilities, she shunned him. She had called him names, made him feel like he was some freak of nature, constantly asking aloud why she couldn't have had a normal child.

Normal. Just what was normal? She called him a monster, but she was no human being herself. Surely even monsters loved their children? They didn't lock their own flesh and blood up in an underground cell for being who they were. She didn't acknowledge his abilities as a gift, as something special about him that mad him unique. No, instead she treated him like some object, tossing him aside whenever he didn't act as she wanted him to. This woman claimed to be a mother, but only took on the responsibility of that title as far as giving birth to him, something that she seemed to regret later.

As a result, Hisoka had no choice but to distance himself. There was always a barrier between him and the rest of the world. It lessened the hurt. He learned it helped to be cold. If he acted like he didn't care, people didn't bother with him. If people didn't bother with him, then they couldn't hurt him. He didn't make connections with anyone. It hurt far less to be shunned if he wasn't close to the person to begin with.

Though, the cold exterior was just another barrier; a shell to protect the soft, vulnerable part of him. Despite how he had been treated, he did care about people. That was probably a result of being an Empath. Feeling when other people were in pain would make one want to do something to help. It was a natural reaction Hisoka had to suppress. Why help somebody that was only going to hurt him in return? It was far easier to just stay away from people altogether. His cold shell protected him from the people he did make contact with.

Love. Now there was a foreign emotion. Hisoka knew the word, he knew what it meant by definition, but he never felt it. He didn't feel it when his mother was around his father. Their relationship was complicated. His father only seemed to feel sorrow around his mother, and his mother...well, he just tried not to sense her at all. When they were all together, he withdrew his senses to the best of his abilities. The air was too thick otherwise, it made it hard to breathe. He never felt anybody's love towards him either. His mother only scorned him, and his father always had some sad sense about him.

Hisoka could remember one time as a child when he sensed what he had labeled as love. It had been one of those few times his parents let him outside. His mother had wanted to leave him home, but his father insisted on bringing him along. They were going shopping, and Hisoka needed some new clothes too. His father at least was nice enough to let him pick out his own stuff. As they were walking down the sidewalk, a young man and woman holding hands were walking behind them along with a little girl. They were all laughing with each other. The motion they gave off had been so warm. They were having fun, just happy to be around one another. Hisoka had unconsciously slowed his step and drifted back near them. It was so much more inviting than the coldness his mother gave off and more tolerable than the sorrow emanating from his father.

When they got home, Hisoka was locked in the basement.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I don't let anybody get close to me. Not physically, and most certainly not emotionally. They can try all they want (not that anybody would really care to try anyway), but they won't get far. It's easy locking people out now; I've done it my whole life. Heh, sounds strange saying that now that I'm dead.

Apparently, Shinigami have to work in partners. Figures. I'd rather work alone. I'm not going to argue though. It shouldn't be too hard keeping things strictly business. I'll work with my partner when I have to, the rest of the time I can keep to myself.

The only problem is who they paired me with.

Tsuzuki is not what I was expecting when I was told I had to work with him. The guy is lazy, immature, and irresponsible. It's no wonder he doesn't have a partner, nobody wants to work with a person like that. Though, as much as it angers me that I'm stuck with him, it might not be so bad after all. I can probably get all the work done by myself and not have to deal with him. That, and he probably won't care to pay much attention to me, so I can work at my own agenda. Tsuzuki seems gullible. It shouldn't be too hard to find out who killed me.

Tsuzuki doesn't like my attitude. He was pissed when I didn't meet up with him like we planned. His anger hurt. Don't get me wrong, it's not because I care, but because he had to grab my shoulders. Physical contact increases the strength of the other person's emotions that I can feel. Strong emotions can shake me up, and anger really hits hard. I told him this, and told him to stay away. He's convinced I hate him. That's not really true, hate is such a strong word, and he doesn't fall quite so far down as the people I can say I actually do hate. I don't particularly care for him, but I wouldn't say I hate him. Well, whatever. If he thinks I hate him, it will be easier to keep him distant.

Go ahead, Tsuzuki, leave. Break the partnership. It won't hurt me anymore than I've already been hurt.

I want to push him away. Let him keep thinking I hate him. I want him to hate me. I want him to leave.

...Don't I?

I've never been more confused than I am now. I thought I wanted him to break the partnership. The sooner, the better. And yet, I'm finding it hard to say that. It's not hard to tell him that he can break it if _he_ wants, but I can't tell him that it's what _I_ want. For the first time, I don't believe myself when I say it wouldn't hurt for Tsuzuki to cancel our partnership. I don't know what happened, but he's cracked the walls I've built up for so long.

And I'm afraid.

I'm afraid to be hurt in the end. Nobody has ever cared about me before, so why should this time be any different? Why is Tsuzuki able to slip through when nobody else has?

There's something about him. I'm not sure what it is, but I can't keep him away. He isn't like everyone else. It's not like all of the other times I've locked people out. This time, I _can't_ lock Tsuzuki out. He broke the walls down easier than it was for me to put them up in the first place. Is this what it really feels like to have a true friend? To know somebody is there for you?

This time, somebody is fighting for me.

I was kidnapped. Kidnapped by the one who originally killed me, no less. I was sure it was the end for me. Killed by the same guy twice. Talk about irony. Though, that wasn't nearly the strange part. No, what was strange was when my thoughts kept wandering back to Tsuzuki. He's treated me so nicely despite the fact I've been cold to him. What was even more surprising than that was the fact he actually came to help me. It was so obviously a trap. Muraki was using me just to draw Tsuzuki out, and, fully knowing that, Tsuzuki came anyway. He even went so far as to protect me while he and Muraki fought. He shielded me. With his own body. The wound was severe, but he didn't regret it in the least. That's when he asked to borrow my power. My first instinct was to pull away, since I was synchronized with his pain via my empathy, but I made no move to do so. I couldn't, not after he had protected me. Lending him my power was the least I could do, even if it did exhaust me, so I did. Tsuzuki beat Muraki.

When I asked Tsuzuki why he would bother to protect me, why he even cared, all he said was that it was because we are partners.

This time, somebody sincerely cares.

It's easy to lock people out when they don't care. Some try to get to be your friend, but give up once their realize they have to work at it or find that you just don't want to be friends. When the person is willing to work at it, however, it becomes much harder. Tsuzuki is all too willing to work at it. I'm finding it impossible to force out a person who wants to be there.

Strangely enough, I think I want Tsuzuki to break through. The fear is still there, but there's also something else. A desire, perhaps? Nobody has cared about me before, as family, as a friend, as a human being...nothing. I can't help but think it would feel nice to be loved. Any kind would do, just a simple friendship is enough. Something to let me know somebody cares. I want to be able to feel what those other people feel.

I've come to enjoy being around Tsuzuki, even if I don't show it. Everyone in the Shokan Division is nice, I enjoy all their company, but I like Tsuzuki's the most.

There is still a fear my hopes will be crushed, my trust will be betrayed, my love will be denied. But it's all there. And I'm giving it to you, Tsuzuki. I might not admit it, but you know. You can read me all too easily. You've already broken through, so please...as a partner, as a friend, as a sort of brother, whatever more you think of me...

Don't leave me, please...

Tsuzuki...


	2. Infestation

_**Summary:** After forgetting half of a cupcake on his desk overnight, Tsuzuki returns to work the next morning to discover he has accidentally invited some unwanted guests._

_**Genre: **Humor_

_**Character:** Tsuzuki Asato_

_**Rating:** K+_

_**Words:** 3,214_

_**Author's Note:** The idea for this fic came one night a while back at the dinner table. For an odd reason I can't remember, I began pretending my finger was an ant and started talking for it. My sister said it sounded like I was writing a fanfiction, and the first person I thought of that would cause such a thing was Tsuzuki. Being the dork I am, I had to write it. So, here it is.  
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It was a day just like any other; the sun was shining, the cherry blossom trees were in bloom, and Tsuzuki was late for work. It wasn't that he had taken too long to get ready (in fact, he had rushed through even breakfast), or that his alarm clock hadn't gone off. The reason for him being late was simply because he hit the snooze button a few too many times, which wasn't unusual for him. He was halfway out the door when he realized he had forgotten his keys, ran back in, searched around frantically for them, found them underneath the kitchen table where they had presumably fallen, ran back out the door, locked it, and headed to work. A glance at his watch told him he was going to be twenty minutes late, which also meant that Tatsumi was going to cut that out of his paycheck.

The secretary didn't even bother yelling at Tsuzuki for being late anymore, he simply took out whatever money he would have made in that time before handing Tsuzuki the paycheck. It actually did work, to a degree, when Tsuzuki figured out one day that, with the money he was losing by showing up late or taking too long of a lunch break, he could be having a couple more slices of apple pie and an extra cinnamon roll a week. Of course, this didn't completely solve the problem; when Tsuzuki was tired, he wasn't thinking about the money he was losing, just about the sleep he was losing and sometimes hit the snooze button anyway.

When Tsuzuki finally arrived at the office, Tatsumi seemed to be waiting for him.

"Good morning, Tatsumi!" Tsuzuki said in his usual cheerful tone despite the annoyed expression on Tatsumi's face.

"This morning is far from good, Tsuzuki." The secretary replied, a threatening tone in his voice and added stress on his fellow Shinigami's name.

Tsuzuki's cheery outlook fell a couple levels. Tatsumi was angry at him for something, which he assumed was for being late. "Ah, I'm sorry, Tatsumi! I was just so tired, and I didn't realize what time it was and-"

"Do you remember leaving half of a cupcake on your desk before leaving work last night, Tsuzuki?"

A half-eaten cupcake? Oh, so that's where it went. He had remembered eating half the cupcake, getting up to turn in his paperwork, then, when he went to finish it, couldn't seem to find it and assumed he had eaten it all already. It wasn't unusual for him to go to eat something, only to realize he had already done so, much to his disappointment, so he hadn't even thought on it. "Oh, yes, I think I did. I thought I had eaten it all but I guess not. Why do you ask?"

"Why do I ask? Why don't you take a look down by your feet!"

Confused, but not wanting to disobey Tatsumi, Tsuzuki looked down on the floor. It didn't take him long before he spotted what he assumed Tatsumi wanted him to see: a line of small, black ants marching by them and deeper into the building. Before Tsuzuki could even say anything, Tatsumi continued speaking.

"That's right, ants. The building is now infested with them because you left food out!"

"Why don't you just get rid of the cupcake then? Won't that make them go away?"

Tatsumi appeared to only be slightly less angry about the situation than he would have been if he had just been told they were receiving a budget cut. "No, it won't. Do you know why? It's because they found food elsewhere, mainly in _your_ office, and now they are all over the place!"

"Is Tsuzuki here?" A voice called out from somewhere behind Tatsumi. A moment later, Hisoka appeared beside him, looking no more pleased than the secretary.

Tsuzuki grinned. "Hisoka! Good mor- OW!" His greeting was cut short as his partner hit him upside the head rather harshly.

"You idiot! Our office is crawling with ants now, and there are too many to get rid of! I am _not_ working with bugs creeping all over the place!"

"It was an accident!"

"How do you accidentally forget half of a cupcake on the desk?!"

"I thought I had eaten it all."

"Either way," Tatsumi cut in, pushing his glasses up that gave a dangerous gleam when the light caught them, "the building is infested and we need to get it clean. We may have to get an exterminator."

Hisoka raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure you want to do that? It'll be costly."

Tatsumi laughed a laugh that sent a shiver down Tsuzuki's spine. "I won't be the one paying for it. It will all be coming out of Tsuzuki-san's paycheck."

"Of course...but then the place is going to stink like bug poison, and we can't work in that all day."

"Hmm...you do have a point there, Kurosaki. We can't very well let everyone have the day off while the building airs out..."

"I have the solution! I have the solution!"

Tatsumi sighed as he heard one of the last voices he wanted to hear at the moment: Watari's. "Watari, please, this isn't the time for your unusual experiments."

Watari huffed. "You don't even know what it is yet! And it happens to be the perfect time! You can't get the ants out, and I have a solution! I call it, the Ant Annihilator 3426!" At this, Watari held out what looked like a mechanical anteater. It was three and a half feet long, approximately half the size of what a real giant anteater would be. It had what appeared to be small cameras for eyes, and it's snout was segmented for proper movement.

"Why 3,462?" Hisoka asked. He was used to Watari coming up with odd things (though, compared to the others, this one actually seemed normal), but it was the most random number the wannabe scientist had used yet.

Watari grinned. "Because that is what I calculated it's max capacity to be: 3,462 small ants. Besides, it sounds cool."

"Okay...then how does it work?"

"Well, first it gives off the aroma of food to attract all the ants in the area. Since the only opening is through the snout, that's where they go to. Once they get close enough, special lasers sense the movement and the vacuum is activated. The little cameras in the eyes seek out the ants and the machine chases after them, sucking them all up! Isn't it brilliant?!"

As usual, Watari's owl, 003, was the only other person besides Watari himself who seemed at all excited. He sat on Watari's shoulder, hooting and clapping his wings together, praising Watari for his invention.

Tatsumi wasn't sure what to say. He was torn between scolding Watari for wasting money on such crazy inventions and actually giving him a chance. The only reason he was even considering the latter was because it actually sounded like a somewhat decent idea. Provided this invention of his actually worked (which Tatsumi believed unlikely), it would be a good alternative to hiring somebody to come in and take care of the infestation.

"How long does it take?" Tatsumi asked.

Watari beamed, ecstatic that Tatsumi seemed to be actually considering letting him try his invention. In fact, such a thing was unprecedented. "It shouldn't take long at all! Much better than spending money to have somebody else take care of it, right Tatsumi?" He grinned, using Tatsumi's hatred of spending money to get the secretary to agree to the invention.

Tatsumi sighed. "Alright, fine. We'll see what it can do."

"Follow me!" Watari turned around, his invention still in his arms, and marched to Tsuzuki and Hisoka's office, where the infestation was the worst.

Once they got there, Hisoka refused to enter. He stopped at the doorway, cringing as he spotted what was left of the cupcake, the entire thing covered in black ants to the point where the food's identity would have been a mystery had he not already known what it was. He looked over at Tsuzuki with a dangerous glint in his eyes.

"You are never allowed to eat in our office again. Yes, that means no snacks between meals or munching chips while you do your paperwork. You always leave food stains on your papers anyway."

Tsuzuki frowned. Unfortunately, his classic puppy-dog-eyes look didn't win Hisoka over nearly as easily as it did Tatsumi, so he'd have to try really hard to come up with something to get Hisoka to change his mind later...if that was even possible at this point.

Watari set his Ant Annihilator 3426 down on Tsuzuki's desk and pressed a button near the back of the machine's neck. Its eyes flashed yellow as the device sprang to life, its snout wiggling to the side in a way that was surprisingly close to that of a real ant eater. It made a couple small beeping sounds, then stood still. Since the ants were already occupied with a sweet treat, they didn't bother to move toward the scent of food emanating from the machine. A couple that were not on the cupcake, however, began crawling over. One crawled into its snout, the bottom tip of which was just touching the desk, and the machine beeped again, then the vacuum was activated. The ant was sucked up, along with the few other ants within range. The ant eater then began walking slowly forward, taking one step at a time, sucking up the ants in the area, then moving ever closer to the ant-covered cupcake. Once it was close enough, it raised its mechanical snout and began sucking up the ants on the cupcake. Unfortunately, the vacuum was a tad too strong, and it sucked up the rest of the cupcake as well. The cupcake was far too big for the snout, and was stuck to it as the vacuum kept trying to suck it up. A moment later, there was a small popping noise. The cupcake fell to the ground as the machine turned off. Watari walked over and pressed the button again, but it made no response.

"Hmmm...seems it has broken. But, not to worry, I can fix it in no time! Just a simple error on my part."

Tatsumi had his forehead resting against his fingers, the elbow of his arm propped up on his other hand, eyes closed in agitation. "Of course." He mumbled to nobody in particular, "I should have known better."

Watari grabbed his Ant Annihilator 3426 and ran out the door. "I'll be back in a few minutes!" He yelled on his way out.

Hisoka sighed. "Great. Now what?"

"This is your fault, Tsuzuki-san." Tatsumi said, barely turning to face Tsuzuki. "You should be the one figuring out what to do."

"Ah....uh..." Tsuzuki stared at the cupcake, which was being reclaimed by more ants. "What if we leave more food outside of the door and clean up all the food in here? Then they will all move outside!"

Hisoka restrained himself from hitting Tsuzuki again. "No, Tsuzuki, that would only attract more ants from outside, and then they, too, would wander inside.

"We may have no choice...but to hire an exterminator and take the rest of the day off..." Tatsumi managed to mutter, albeit very reluctantly.

The youngest stared at the secretary in disbelief. "Tatsumi-san...you can't be serious!"

"I know, Kurosaki-kun, but I fear there is no other alternative. Watari's inventions are unreliable, and I can't think of any other solution that wouldn't take all day."

"No, Tatsumi-san! You mustn't give up! There has to be another way!"

Tatsumi shook his head. "It's okay, Kurosaki-kun...I...I have to accept the fact it's our only viable solution. Our budget will take a hit...but it will be fine, because it will all come out of Tsuzuki-san's paycheck."

"But what about payment for the rest of us? We can't work today if you do that!"

"That, too, will have to come from Tsuzuki's paycheck. It seems he will be working for free for a couple weeks."

"No, Tatsumi-san, you don't understand! If we do that, then Tsuzuki won't be able to afford any food, so he'll be at my house asking me to feed him and to give him a place to stay when his electricity gets shut off."

"I'm sorry, Kurosaki-kun, but, as his partner, that is a sacrifice you will ha-"

"He'll be at your house too when I run out of food for him."

Tatsumi was silent for a moment. "Tsuzuki not being paid for a few weeks will be a problem. We may just have to put up with ants until we can figure out what to do."

Hisoka shuddered. "You want us to sit around with ants crawling all over the place? I can't work like that! And I have to stay in this office! Take it out of _my_ pay if you have to, I am not working with ants all over the place."

Tsuzuki's face brightened. "Hisoka, you'd help pay it for me?"

Hisoka's glare erased the grin as faster than it had appeared. "Help pay it _for you_? Hah! I'd only do it so I don't have to work in a building infested with ants! You'd owe me _big time_!"

"So mean!" Tsuzuki pouted.

"Mean? You are the reason we have to go through this to begin with! You want mean? I'll show you mean!"

Tsuzuki's lower lip trembled. "I'm sorry, I really am! I'll pay for it if you want, please don't be mad! I'm sorry!"

His partner's pouting had not softened Hisoka's gaze. Tatsumi, however, was affected. He bit his lower lip, not wanting to give in, but finding it hard to ignore that sad look Tsuzuki was giving them.

"Maybe we're being a bit harsh..."

"Tatsumi!" Tsuzuki grinned, brightening up.

"However," Once again, Tsuzuki's grin faded as Tatsumi continued, "it _is_ still your fault, and you will have to remedy this situation somehow. If that boils down to you working overtime in order to pay off the debt, so be it."

Tsuzuki hung his head. "Yes, Tatsumi..." At least being in debt to Tatsumi wouldn't be nearly as bad as being in debt to Hakushaku was. Tatsumi actually wanted money, not Tsuzuki. Though, Tatsumi was scary when it came to money. It was the lesser of two evils. Tsuzuki could only hope being in debt to Tatsumi wouldn't be as bad. "Aren't there other ways to get rid of ants?" He asked in a desperate attempt to avoid working overtime.

"We might be able to find something online, actually." Hisoka said.

"Alright, let's go then!" Tsuzuki said, slightly hopeful, and began heading to his office when Hisoka grabbed his arm.

"Not our office, there are too many ants. We'll use Tatsumi's."

In Tatsumi's office, a Google search had brought up a list of possible ways to get rid of ants. Scrolling through them, Hisoka took note of all the ones that could possibly work. Unfortunately, that list was small.

"Lining the entryways won't work very well since the building is so large. The ants already know there is food in here, so even if we cut them off from our office, they will probably just roam around the rest of the building in search of food. We could leave cornmeal out for them. Apparently, they can't digest it and when they consume water after the cornmeal, the cornmeal swells inside their digestive organs and kills them."

Tsuzuki frowned. "That sounds a bit harsh, even for ants. It has to be painful."

Hisoka raised an eyebrow. "And killing them with poison isn't?"

"Are there any other ways?"

"Well, other than laying some bait down where they are gathering, it also lists leaving scents that ants don't like and pouring boiling water into their nest."

"Why don't we try all of them?" Tatsumi suggested. "If we can get them out but not have to take the day off, that will be perfect!"

Hisoka sighed and muttered, "Other than the fact we still have to work with them crawling everywhere until they are all taken care of."

About a half hour later, the Shinigami had laid various traps out for the ants. Small bowls of cornmeal were left at a few spots for them to consume along with a couple different ant poisons, and cinnamon, black pepper and bay leaves were also scattered about to deter ants due to the smell. Tatsumi even had Tsuzuki wipe down his desk and a few other surfaces with a 50% water and 50% vinegar solution, which was also said to deter ants due to the smell.

A couple of minutes after all the ant traps had been set out, Watari returned with his machine.

"I fixed it! Now presenting the Ant Annihilator 4039!"

Before anybody even got a chance to say anything, the mechanical engineer had turned his new machine on and let it go to work. Surprisingly to the others, it actually seemed successful. It walked about slowly, sucking up all the ants in its path. When it didn't break down in the first couple of minutes, Watari was ecstatic.

"Hah hah! Look at it go! Pretty soon, this place will be clean of ants!"

Tatsumi watched the machine for a moment, then turned to Tsuzuki and Hisoka. "Well, I believe we can get back to work now. The ants will be taken care of, and your office will be cleaned first, so you don't have to worry about working with bugs crawling around all day, Kurosaki-kun." The tone in Tatsumi's voice was enough to tell Hisoka that he would take no more complaining, despite his polite words. "And, Tsuzuki-san, in order to make sure we completely get rid of the ants, you are to spend the day cleaning all of our offices and leaving not a crumb or sticky spot anywhere. After that you can worry about your paper work."

Tsuzuki groaned, but didn't dare argue, afraid that Tatsumi would further cut his already diminishing paycheck. "Yes, Tatsumi..."

The secretary grinned. "Good. Now, I have my own work to get done. It's bad enough we wasted over an hour." With that, he turned around and headed to his office. Hisoka waited until Watari's Ant Annihilator 4039 was out of the way, then took a seat at his desk, glancing around every so often to make sure there were no ants around. Tsuzuki, meanwhile, began the task of cleaning, starting with his and Hisoka's office. His partner refused to talk to him, which certainly didn't make cleaning any more interesting. And to think, after he was done with that, Tsuzuki still had to do his regular work.

It was going to be a long day.


	3. I'll Be Your Reason

**_Summary:_**_ Tsuzuki has made a decision, but he can't go without seeing Hisoka one last time.  
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_**Rating:** K+_

_**Genre:** Hurt/comfort/angst_

_**Characters:** Tsuzuki Asato, Kurosaki Hisoka  
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**_Words:_**_ 2,863_

_**Author's Note:** Also originally a songfic, I have rewritten this so that it includes only my own work. All lyrics have been removed. Inspired by the song "The Last Night" by Skillet.  
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As soon as Hisoka opens the door, he knows something is wrong. The despair is rolling off Tsuzuki in waves despite the smile on his face. He is trying his utmost to suppress the negative feelings too, but it still isn't enough to hide them from the Empath.

"Hey, Hisoka. Mind if I come in?"

Hisoka steps aside, letting his partner in and closes the door behind them.

"Tsuzuki, what's wrong?"

"Hm? Oh, nothing, I just wanted to come see you. I have nothing to do, so if you're not busy, I thought we could just hang out for a little while." The smile on his face never falters even though his purple eyes don't hold their usual sparkle.

For a moment, Hisoka simply looks at the older man, waiting for him to say something more. When he doesn't, Hisoka decides to leave it for the moment until they get situated. "Alright. I'll make some tea, make yourself comfortable."

As Tsuzuki goes to sit on the couch in the living room, Hisoka heads to the kitchen to heat up some water. While waiting for the water to boil, he gets the tea bags and a bottle of honey. Honey isn't something he often uses himself, but he knows Tsuzuki likes it in his tea so he keeps some around for times like these.

A few minutes later, the tea is ready, and Hisoka carries it into the living room on a tray along with the bottle of honey. He passes Tsuzuki a cup and the honey and keeps the other cup for himself.

"Thanks, Hisoka." Tsuzuki smiles as he pours some honey into his tea.

Hisoka shakes his head. "Why don't you have some tea with your honey?" He teases. With the amount Tsuzuki is using, he might as well just eat the honey straight from the bottle.

Tsuzuki chuckles, though it sounds hollow to him. He hopes Hisoka doesn't pick up on it. Now that the tea is nice and sweet, Tsuzuki takes a sip. Ah, perfect!

"Tsuzuki, are you okay?" Hisoka suddenly asks. His cup is still sitting on the table, completely ignored, his emerald eyes fixed on Tsuzuki's amethyst ones and filled with concern.

"I'm fine, really" Tsuzuki lies. In actuality, he is anything but fine. He is depressed again, much like that night in Kyoto. He'd thought about it a lot in the past couple of days, the impact his life has on everyone. It all came back to something negative. Hisoka had told him he needed him that night, and, at the moment, Tsuzuki had believed it, but now he is starting to wonder. He wants Hisoka to be happy and wants to protect him, but he isn't protecting Hisoka from his own depression. Being an Empath, Hisoka is so sensitive to Tsuzuki's feelings, and to see the hurt in his eyes every time he senses Tsuzuki is upset is too much. As close as they have gotten since the first time they met (Hisoka especially has become more open), sometimes Tsuzuki wonders if he should really stay partners with Hisoka. He can't help but feel that sometimes, it seems they are treading on thin ice, Tsuzuki trying not to let Hisoka catch any negative feelings or thoughts coming from him, and Hisoka trying not to do anything that would trigger Tsuzuki's depression. It is a delicate rope they have been walking, and Tsuzuki can't stand the fact he is hurting Hisoka. It isn't just his partner he is hurting either. He's hurt Tatsumi in the past, and he still did with the occasional slip-up. He won't be able to act happy forever.

Masks could only be worn so many times before they fell apart.

So he decided. After much thinking, he decided they would all be better off if he just isn't around. If he isn't there, he couldn't hurt them anymore. He couldn't hurt anyone anymore.

Tsuzuki has no reason to stay.

Of course, it is hard to go without seeing Hisoka one last time. He wants to say goodbye. Naturally, he isn't going to tell Hisoka that the goodbye he is going to give before leaving the house will be the last one, but he can't just leave otherwise. Tsuzuki is determined to put on his best smile for Hisoka tonight. It will be hard, but he wants their final time together to be enjoyable. He isn't going to let Hisoka's last memories of him include tears.

Hisoka shakes his head, fighting the urge to punch Tsuzuki. Why does he always have to hide? Can't Tsuzuki trust him? After all they've been through, Tsuzuki still feels like he can't talk to him? "You're lying to me. Tell me, Tsuzuki. I know something is wrong. Stop lying to me all the time and tell me the truth!"

Tsuzuki is silent. He stares into the tea cup, his thoughts unreadable.

"Tsuzuki..."

Finally, he looks up and smiles. "Sorry, Hisoka. I've just been a little upset lately. That's why I wanted to come over, I figured it'd make me feel better." Another lie.

At least now they are getting somewhere. Hisoka's gaze softens, but he isn't ready to let up. "I'm listening, you know. You can talk to me about it."

"Ah, I don't want to ruin your night. It's okay, I'll be fine. Want to play a game or something?"

Hisoka clenches his fists. Why can't Tsuzuki get it through his thick skull that he _wants_ to listen?! How can he be of help if he doesn't even know what is going on? "Did you ever stop to think that maybe I _want_ to know what is going on? You always say that you want to help me, but you never let me help you and I'm sick of it! How can I be your partner- hell, how can I even be your friend if you never tell me what's going on?!" Hisoka yells, slamming his hands down on the coffee table and accidentally spilling his tea.

Tsuzuki averts his eyes to the fallen cup and reaches to help clean it up. Hisoka freezes when he gets a glance of his partner's wrist. His watch is slightly askew, failing to completely cover up one of the marks Tsuzuki always keeps hidden. The thing is, this one isn't quite a scar yet. Considering Tsuzuki's advanced healing compared to that of a normal, living person, it looks new.

"Tsuzuki, let me see your hand."

The older man quickly withdraws, knowing what Hisoka has seen and trying to slip his way out of the situation.

"My hand? What do you need that for?"

"Dammit, Tsuzuki, just give me your hand!" Without another warning, Hisoka reaches over and grabs Tsuzuki's wrist. Everything Tsuzuki is feeling comes crashing into him all at once.

Pain, despair, desolation, sorrow...all of it comes rushing at Hisoka, crushing him and making it nearly impossible to breathe. Memories of tears, images of blood. A pair of sapphire eyes peeking through lenses, filled with regret. Bright green eyes brimming with tears. A young woman screaming out in agony. Voices chanting the same words, "You aren't supposed to exist." The feeling of absolute worthlessness. Hisoka feels as if he has just been buried alive under 6 feet of concrete, except there is nobody on the ground above grieving for him. While he is in this dark solitude, the world outside is bright.

Tsuzuki freezes as Hisoka grabs his wrist. There is no hiding his feelings from Hisoka now. The Empath was sure to find everything Tsuzuki has buried these past few days. He can't stop the images and thoughts from appearing in his mind and flowing to Hisoka either. He can see it in his partner's pained expression.

It all comes rushing back, everyone he has ever hurt, everyone that has been killed because of him, every time Tatsumi walked away because he couldn't stay with Tsuzuki, every time Hisoka was hurt because of his depression, everything that made him depressed in the first place.

He remembers the first time he cut himself back in his childhood. It was after one of the many times he had been bullied. Of course, he kept the bullying a secret the best he could. He didn't want the other children to hate him even more for telling on them. When he did tell his sister he had been bullied, he never gave names. After all, he just wanted to fit in with them, not be their enemy. After a while, however, the bullying had caught up with him. He'd lost his optimism, instead believing he could never fit in and that he'd always be hated by normal people, people who didn't have an eye color that wasn't seen in humans. When the cuts healed quickly, it only further reminded him about how different he was. Luckily for him, he was good at keeping the marks hidden. Nobody really suspected he was depressed- he had always been good at wearing a fake smile. An adult (who just happened to be one of the parents of the children who bullied Tsuzuki) had suspected that Tsuzuki was a bit upset, but figured it was just a phase and he'd get over it. Tsuzuki knew it was not so simple.

Hisoka releases Tsuzuki's wrist and stumbles back. For a moment, he says nothing, trying to catch his breath and prevent himself from collapsing. When he looks back up at Tsuzuki, he snaps.

"You IDIOT! How can you think that? How could you believe you can hide that from me?! How can you want to...want to..." He can't bring himself to speak the words. After everything that happened, Tsuzuki still wants to end his existence? Everything Hisoka has told him, all the trust and support he has given him, is it not enough? Is caring about him simply not good enough?

Tsuzuki looks down, refusing to meet Hisoka's eyes. "I'm sorry, Hisoka." His voice is strained, as if it is taking all his energy just to talk. "I just can't..."

"Can't what? Can't trust me? Can't believe that people care about you, that people want you in their lives?"

"It's not that simple!" Tsuzuki yells, raising his voice for the first time at Hisoka. When he realizes he yelled, he lowers his voice, further upset at himself for doing such a thing. "I can't keep relationships with anybody. Everybody I come into contact with is only hurt. People have died just because they saw me! The people I care about most are the ones I hurt the most. Just look at what I did to you now! It would be better...if I wasn't here to hurt anyone anymore."

Hisoka is trying his hardest to hold back tears. His fingernails are digging into his palms from clenching his fists as he tries to control his shaking. Tsuzuki is right about one thing: it hurts. It hurts more than anything to hear what Tsuzuki said, and it hurts even more to know he means it. What Tsuzuki is wrong about is that if he was gone, things would not be better. Not for Tatsumi, not for Hisoka, not for anybody.

"You're wrong, Tsuzuki. You think that if you were gone, my life would be better? You don't think losing you would hurt us more than anything else you could ever do? You always keep things bottled up." Hisoka's voice is cracking as he fights to keep it under control. "You sit and suffer alone, but you don't have to. Don't you know that it hurts me more to be left out and know you are suffering in silence than it would for you to just tell me and let me help you?"

Tsuzuki says nothing. He had been afraid of this. If he could have prevented Hisoka from touching him, things would be a bit easier, but all that is thrown to the wind now. He isn't going to be able to let Hisoka's last memory of him be a happy one. It isn't going to be easy at all to continue on.

Tsuzuki suddenly turns on his heel and runs out of the room, heading for the door.

"Tsuzuki!" Hisoka yells, chasing after him. He'll be damned if he is going to let Tsuzuki leave his house in this condition. He doesn't care if he has to tie the man down and beat him, he is not letting Tsuzuki do this.

Before Tsuzuki gets a chance to get the door open, Hisoka grabs his hand. It takes all he has to keep a firm grip on his partner without collapsing from the emotional overload, but he refuses to go down when Tsuzuki needs him the most.

"Tsuzuki...get...back here!" Hisoka demands, tugging at Tsuzuki with both hands and pulling him away from the door. When he finally gets Tsuzuki far enough from the door that Tsuzuki can no longer reach it, he spins the older man around to face him.

"I'm not going to let you do this. I don't care what you think. You can hate me forever, but you are not going to leave us." Hisoka's tone gets softer, pleading, "Please, Tsuzuki, just let me help...I'll do whatever it takes..."

Tsuzuki doesn't know what to say. His plan totally backfired, and now Hisoka is standing before him, tears ready to leak down his face any moment, holding his hand and begging him to just accept his help. Tsuzuki looks to the side, down at the ground, unable to face Hisoka.

"Hisoka...I..."

He stops as Hisoka touches his cheek, directing his gaze until he is staring into Hisoka's emerald eyes.

"Tsuzuki, I'm here for you. I always have been. You can tell me anything. I'm not going to think any less of you for it. I just want to know what is going on, exactly how you are feeling. I want to help make it better."

Hisoka releases his grip on Tsuzuki's hand and wraps his arms around his partner. "You're not alone, Tsuzuki. You're never alone."

Everything Tsuzuki had been feeling before, everything that had almost driven him to suicide again, is suddenly dissolved. It is impossible for him to walk away now. He can't push Hisoka away. He can only draw him closer as he returns the embrace.

"I'm sorry, Hisoka." He chokes, no longer able to hold in his emotions. It all spills out with the tears rolling down his cheeks. "I'm sorry for ever hurting you. I'm sorry for-"

"Don't say that." Hisoka interrupts. He doesn't want to hear Tsuzuki apologize for being Tsuzuki. "Don't apologize, idiot. I like you the way you are, quirks and all. You aren't the hurtful burden you think you are. Just don't leave me out anymore. I want you to be able to tell me anything. I want to be the one you turn to when you need help. Whatever you need, I want to provide it."

The tears are flowing freely now, letting all of Tsuzuki's sorrow out, dropping onto Hisoka's shirt where they are absorbed. "But it's only going to happen again! I can't help it. It always happens, and I hate myself for it."

"Then just accept it instead of hating yourself for it and ask for help. We all get upset, Tsuzuki. Your problem is you try to hide it. If you don't want to hurt me, then don't do this to yourself. It won't hurt me if you ask for help, no matter how sad you are. In fact, it would make me happy to be able to help you. It only hurts when you keep it from me. You think there is no reason for you to stay, but you are wrong. If you can't find a reason, then let me give you one. I'll be your reason. If nothing else, stay for me."

Tsuzuki wonders if, in fact, the unconscious reason he had come to Hisoka in the first place had been exactly that. Was it the fact that he had wanted to say goodbye, or was it actually the fact he hoped that Hisoka really would make him feel better? Was his coming here an attempt to ask for help, despite what he told himself? After all, he couldn't protect Hisoka if he wasn't around.

Tsuzuki has found his reason to stay.

Hisoka withdraws his arms and looks into Tsuzuki's eyes again. "Don't ever think you have to leave." Tsuzuki closes his eyes as his Hisoka reaches up and wipes the tears from his partner's face. Tsuzuki has stopped crying now, his arms still loosely around Hisoka. His forehead is leaning against that of the younger, the tips of their noses touching. "Don't ever leave me." Hisoka whispers, his thumb tracing down from where he had wiped a tear away, following the path the others had taken, down Tsuzuki's cheek, stopping at his chin.

"I won't. I promise."


	4. Inseparable

_**Summary:** They both knew they were going to die, but that didn't matter anymore. They were together, and there was nothing that could split them apart. A different take on Kyoto, had Tatsumi not saved Tsuzuki and Hisoka in time.  
_

_**Rating: **K+  
_

_**Genre: **Hurt/Comfort/Spiritual  
_

_**Characters: **Tsuzuki Asato, Kurosaki Hisoka  
_

_**Words**: 1,913_

_**Author's Note:** I really need to write something that doesn't involve Tsuzuki and Hisoka... Inspired by the songs "This Is Home" and "Saddest Story Never Told", both by I Am Ghost. No lyrics from either song are included in the story._

* * *

The fire around them was raging, consuming the building and threatening to engulf them in its mass of black flames, but neither of them made a move to try to escape. Neither of them had any desire to. One embraced the flames, waiting for them to finally bring him the ultimate peace he'd always wanted, the other refused to leave his side, no matter the cost.

If Tsuzuki wanted to die that badly, then so be it, but Hisoka would not let him go alone.

The boy had recklessly leaped into the quickly burning building, not giving a single thought to his own safety. All he had cared about was getting to Tsuzuki. Once there, however, Tsuzuki had refused to move, only asking that Hisoka stay away so he wouldn't be killed too. Still, the younger would not accept that, and had thrown his arms around his partner, determined to remain by his side. Listening to Hisoka tell him that he needed him, that he would go wherever he went, Tsuzuki had found it was impossible to keep the boy away. Hisoka always had been stubborn. So, the older man had done the only thing he could do: wrap his arms around his young partner and await the inevitable.

Of course, Hisoka wanted nothing more than to save Tsuzuki. After sixteen long, harsh years of life, he had finally found a reason after death to take advantage of his second chance and _live_. Tsuzuki had given him everything he never had, and everything he'd always wanted. He'd been the first person to show him compassion, the first person to actually care about him. Hisoka hadn't loved his parents, and there was nobody else in his life close enough to even be worthy of the smallest amount of love. Tsuzuki had completely turned that around. He'd given Hisoka everything and asked for nothing. It was inevitable for Hisoka to become so attached to Tsuzuki. In his eyes, Tsuzuki was nothing short of an angel.

As things were, however, saving Tsuzuki was not possible. Touda's fire had already grown too great, and, with Tsuzuki refusing to get up, it was impossible for Hisoka to try to get him out. So, the empath had to settle for the next best thing: dying with him.

At this point, Hisoka couldn't imagine living without his partner. As much as the older man annoyed him at times, if he lost the only person who had ever cared for him, the only person he had become attached to, he would never get close to another person. If he had been cold before, he'd show as much emotion as a zombie should he lose Tsuzuki. He wouldn't allow Tsuzuki to go thinking he was alone. Even if it was too late to save him, Hisoka would make sure his partner knew that his feelings toward him were reciprocated. The empath cared about Tsuzuki just as much as Tsuzuki cared for him. If Hisoka had to die to let him know that, then so it would be.

Tsuzuki had been his reason to learn to live, and now Tsuzuki was his reason to die.

Tatsumi and Watari were yelling something from outside, but the words didn't clearly reach Hisoka's ears. He did feel bad leaving them. After all, they had also treated him with kindness, they were most certainly good friends, and he felt bad that he would never get to repay them. Tsuzuki needed him more than they did, however, so he did not regret his decision. His only regret was that he was not able to save Tsuzuki earlier. That Tsuzuki had been in so much pain to lead him to suicide made Hisoka feel absolutely horrible. He felt Tsuzuki deserved far better than that, and wished he could have made him feel wanted long ago. He didn't deserve to have gone despising himself for so long. He didn't deserve to be in pain. He deserved to be loved.

As the fire raged on, the two still did not move. They both knew they were going to die like this if nobody else did anything, and they accepted that. They had each other, they didn't need anything else. Nothing could separate them now.

And, despite the looming fate of being burned alive, Tsuzuki felt safe. There was nothing else that could hurt him now, there was nothing else he could do wrong. It was a great relief that he would finally be released. Though he really wished Hisoka hadn't come to him, for Hisoka's sake, another part of him was glad his partner was there. It felt selfish, and his desire to see Hisoka safe outweighed his desire for comfort, but he knew Hisoka was not going to leave. This is what Hisoka wanted, and, this time, he would accept that. Let them both be free from pain, let them both be unbound by the chains of their pasts. They were there for each other, and that was all that mattered. They were in the one place where they both felt they truly belonged: in the arms of one another. The only place Hisoka could call home.

The black flames had closed them in now, becoming ever closer to completely engulfing them. Though the flames licked at him, scorching his clothes and exposed skin, Hisoka bit back his cries of pain. He wouldn't let Tsuzuki feel guilty for hurting him. After all, the emotional pain he'd feel if he survived and Tsuzuki did not far surpassed the physical pain of the high-heat flames. He only clung to Tsuzuki tighter, pulling himself as close as physically possible, and Tsuzuki responded by tightening his arms around his partner and holding him there.

Hisoka hadn't done this because he was afraid of dying. The only thing he was afraid of now was Tsuzuki not knowing how Hisoka truly felt about him. Thus, he spoke through his action. He told Tsuzuki everything he wanted him to know through his actions, how much he appreciated every little thing the older man had done for him, how grateful he was for Tsuzuki's continued and unconditional kindness despite the coldness he had received, how much he needed Tsuzuki.

As the flames began burning both of them, Tsuzuki felt the need to apologize. Apologize not only for bringing this upon them, but for everything he'd ever done wrong. Hisoka knew it was coming before Tsuzuki could part his lips to speak it, and quickly cut him off with a shake of his head. He didn't want Tsuzuki to be sorry, and Tsuzuki could already hear Hisoka's voice in his head, 'Don't apologize, idiot.' So, Tsuzuki said nothing and simply nuzzled Hisoka's neck.

Hisoka turned his face so that his lips were to Tsuzuki's ear. He knew he wouldn't be able to speak loudly, and it would be even harder to hear above the roaring fire, but this he knew his partner would hear.

"I love you."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The building had been long abandoned. Ever since before he was born, in fact, which was a good 16 years ago. He'd been told it was due to an unexplainable fire. That wasn't so unusual, as it was apparently a laboratory, but the rumors about it were a tad out of the ordinary. Those who saw the fire claimed that the flames had been black. As far as he knew, there was no such thing as black fire. The claim of black fire had brought about much speculation, and, as often happened when humans could not explain something, rumors of devils and other such paranormal things began floating around. Many people believed all kinds of horrible experimentation had gone on in that laboratory, including cloning research. Consumed in the fires of their own evil, some people said regarding those who conducted the experiments. All stuff the boy would normally consider utter nonsense.

Normally, had he not found himself strangely attracted to the place, as if it was a magnet pulling him in.

He never told anybody about his occasional visits to this abandoned building. After all, it would sound ridiculous. There was no reason for the area to hold any sort of significance to him, and yet he felt the most unusual attachment to it. It wasn't a positive feeling either. For an unknown reason, he felt as if the fire had actually had an effect on his life. It even haunted his dreams.

Sometimes, he would dream that he was actually in the building as it was burning, which was completely ludicrous, seeing as it had burned to the ground before he had even been alive. He was never alone in the dreams either. There was always somebody else with him, somebody whom he was dead set on staying with. This person had no face, didn't talk, and was completely unidentifiable, yet, in his dream, he felt some strong sort of attachment to the person. It would always end in the both of them being trapped in the flames, and always resulted in the boy waking up in a cold sweat.

And yet, despite this, he visited the area anyway. It didn't make sense, even to him, but he had given up trying to figure out why and simply followed his emotions. This day was different, however. This would be the last time he would see the place as it was: desolate, charred, and completely untouched. After many years of abandonment, the remains of the building were finally going to be torn down, the area landscaped, and a new building put up. It was supposed to be a supermarket. And, to be honest, the boy wasn't sure how he felt about it. It was both a relief to finally be rid of the building that haunted his dreams, and a sort of loss and sadness for the unexplainable sense of attachment he also got from it.

The sound of footsteps interrupted the boy's thoughts, his emerald eyes breaking away from the building to find who else was there. Not too far away from him, another boy stood, one who looked around his age, perhaps slightly older, gazing at the ruins of the building, clearly lost in thought. As the boy stood, watching, the other eventually turned to him, revealing unusually-colored, yet beautiful, purple eyes. His lips began forming into a smile, slowly reaching up to those amethyst orbs, and the green-eyed boy was taken back. Who was this stranger, smiling so freely at somebody he didn't know as if they had been long-time friends? The newcomer took a couple of steps forward, the other suddenly rooted to his spot. He gazed into those purple eyes, eyes that should be alien, yet felt as familiar as his own. As the stranger continued to walk towards him, the boy's thoughts suddenly flew back to his dreams, to the mysterious person he had so longed to be with. Four words echoed in his mind, words that had not been spoken by him, but directed to him, words that he had never remembered until this point, 'I love you too.'

The two boys were now standing no more than a couple feet apart, the one with the purple eyes still smiling. The green-eyed boy suddenly found himself smiling back, not an expression he wore lightly. Neither of them had yet said anything, but both of them knew there was a connection, unspoken words that were nevertheless mutually heard.

'I've been waiting for you.'


	5. Valentine Message Mishap

_**Summary**: Tsuzuki finds a silly Valentine message generator online and decides to send one to Hisoka, but his innocent word choices create a not-so-innocent message..._

_**Rating**: K+  
_

_**Genre**: Humor_

_**Characters**: Tsuzuki Asato, Kurosaki Hisoka  
_

_**Words**: 1,330_

_**Author's Note**: The idea for this came about when I was playing around with the Valentine generator on Gaiaonline. I cosplay Tsuzuki on the site, and decided to fill one out to send to my friend's Hisoka cosplay. After I filed it out and it got sent, however, I realized the words I chose had been placed in...interesting spots to make for an...interesting Valentine. Nothing graphic, just normal, innocent words placed in a way that could give it a totally different meaning. The message that appears in this fic is exactly the message that I created, with the exception of the character's names replacing the usernames. As such, the message template belongs to Gaiaonline, but the word choices were all mine. Anyway, this is mainly for my Hisoka, who decided I should turn this into a little one-shot (which is why this is a week late, as the idea didn't come up until after). Enjoy!_

* * *

It was half-past four, and Tsuzuki had finished his latest report. It was too early to call it quits for the day, but he didn't really feel like starting on something else either, so he decided to give himself a small break. He pulled up the internet browser on his computer to entertain himself with for a little while.

It was a couple days before Valentine's Day, so there were ads all over the place in relation to the holiday. Things like, "Get that special someone what they've always wanted" with a picture of a fancy electronic device, or a diamond ring with a box of chocolates. Mostly things that were way out of his price range, not that he was planning on buying anything fancy for anyone. He didn't have anyone to buy anything for anyway.

After a little browsing, he found something that caught his interest. It was some sort of Valentine generator. Apparently, it asked you to type in some random words, the name of whom it was to, the name of whom it was from, then you would type in the e-mail address of whomever you wanted to send it to, click send, then see the silly Valentine message you created after it sent to the e-mail address you provided. Figuring he would get a chuckle out of it, Tsuzuki decided to try it out.

A small window popped up, and he began filling in random words. The first thing it asked for was a noun. After thinking for a moment, Tsuzuki typed in "kitties". Next was an adjective. Sweet! Like apple pie! Tsuzuki typed "exciting" for another adjective, and "hop" for a verb. Next was a verb in present tense. How about "hugging"? Yes, hugging sounded good! After that was two adjectives. Tsuzuki looked around the room for more ideas. His eyes landed on the fish tank off in the corner. Wet! Now for a second one. He looked down at his desk. Hmmm...how about "hard"? Next up was another verb. For some reason, he thought of "whack", probably from the times Hisoka whacked him upside his head and called him an idiot, usually when he said something goofy that embarrassed Hisoka. That never stopped Tsuzuki from actually making the comments, however. Alright, next was a verb. Eating! Eating was always good. For a number, Tsuzuki picked nine. Lastly, it asked for an adverb. Hmmm..."hungrily"? Sure, that works.

With all the words filled out, Tsuzuki decided to send it to Hisoka, typed in his e-mail address, and hit "Send Valentine". Another window popped up, this time showing Tsuzuki the message he had just sent Hisoka. About halfway through reading it, his mouth dropped open. His innocent word choices hadn't made for the most innocent message. The way a couple of them were placed left it sounding rather suggestive and..._dirty_. Tsuzuki frantically searched for a way to stop the message from being sent, but there was no such option. Once it was sent, it was sent. Tsuzuki bit his lower lip and glanced over at Hisoka, fearing what the younger Shinigami would think of the message.

As an e-mail notification popped up on his screen, Hisoka finished typing his sentence, saved his work, and opened his e-mail. He sighed when he saw it was from Tsuzuki, but opened it up anyway. After the message opened, he read:

_"Dear Hisoka,_

_When I think of you, I get kitties in my stomach. Though it makes me feel sweet, it's also exciting. Whenever we hop together, it feels like all the angels in heaven are hugging at once. How could one person make me feel simultaneously wet and hard with nothing but a bat of the eyelashes and a whack of the eye? I hope we can keep eating together for nine years._

_hungrily yours,_

_Tsuzuki"_

About halfway through the message, Hisoka felt his entire face turn red. He stared at the screen, unsure of what to think. Just what the hell was that supposed to mean?! As if it wasn't bad enough that Tsuzuki was sending him stupid Valentine's messages when they were supposed to be working, to say something like _that_?! If Tsuzuki thought he was being funny, then he was sorely mistaken. Hisoka was not amused in the least. He glanced over at his elder partner, who gave a nervous grin.

Not even wanting to be in the same room with Tsuzuki anymore, Hisoka got up from his chair and began walking out of their office.

"Hisoka! Hold on! I have to tell you something!" Tsuzuki said, standing up from his seat.

"I don't want to hear it!" Hisoka yelled, not stopping.

He was forced to stop, however, as Tsuzuki quickly moved from his spot and grabbed his wrist, talking so fast Hisoka couldn't even make out what he was saying.

"I said I don't want to hear it! That wasn't funny, Tsuzuki! It wasn't funny at all! Let me go!" He tried yanking his arm out of Tsuzuki's grip, but Tsuzuki wasn't letting go.

"No, you don't understand! It was an accident!"

"Accident? How could you accidentally send me that?!"

"It wasn't supposed to come out like _that_! It was a random Valentine's message generator thing I found online! I just typed in random words and it stuck them into a message, and I couldn't stop it from sending after I finished it! Please don't be mad at me, I swear I didn't mean it!"

Hisoka stopped and gave an aggravated sigh. Tsuzuki seemed sincere. Hisoka glanced over at him, something he realized he probably shouldn't have done, as Tsuzuki was looking at him with the eyes of a kicked puppy, a look that made it hard even for Hisoka to remain mad at Tsuzuki.

"Fine. But stop playing with that stupid generator and get back to work. It's bad enough that it's probably going to send me a bunch of spam now, don't need to give it everybody else's e-mail addresses too."

Tsuzuki looked incredibly relieved. "I'll stop, I'll stop!" He gave Hisoka a hug, which the latter shrugged off, then went back to his desk. After Hisoka had sat down, Tsuzuki glanced back over at him, then brought his attention back to his computer screen. A small smile formed on his lips.

A few minutes later, another e-mail notification appeared on Hisoka's screen. When he brought up his e-mail and saw it was once again from Tsuzuki, he was ready to throw the monitor at his stupid partner's head. Noticing it wasn't from the same website, however, he clicked it. The e-mail contained a little Valentine's card. On the top, written in fancy red text were the words, "Will you be my Valentine?" Underneath was the message:

_"I'm really sorry about that last Valentine, I just wanted to give you a little laugh, but that didn't work out right. Can you forgive me for that last one and accept this one? =)"_

Hisoka glanced over at Tsuzuki, who was giving him a hopeful little smile.

"Just for fun?"

Though Tsuzuki said it was just for fun, Hisoka sensed another underlying intention. It wasn't anything creepy or even unwanted. It was a purely innocent, happy sort of feeling. Hisoka wondered how serious Tsuzuki actually was about asking Hisoka to be his Valentine. "Alright...I accept. Just...no more Valentines messages."

Tsuzuki chuckled. "No more Valentines messages." Hisoka was about to turn around to go back to his work when Tsuzuki spoke again, "Hisoka?"

"What?"

"Thanks."

Hisoka looked at Tsuzuki for a moment, trying to figure out exactly what he was thanking him for. It seemed more than just his forgiveness for the Valentine message gone wrong. Whatever it was, Tsuzuki was grateful for it, and his smile was contagious. Hisoka couldn't help but give him a small grin in return.

"No problem."


	6. Anchor

_**Summary**: Ukyou was the anchor to Muraki's sanity, and all he ever truly loved.  
_

_**Rating**: K+  
_

_**Genre**: Romance_

_**Characters**: Muraki Kazutakta, Sakuraiji Ukyou  
_

_**Words**: 540  
_

_**Author's Note**: Just a small little something I wanted to write for these two, since I rarely see anything about them. I know it's really short, but hopefully enjoyable nevertheless.  
_

* * *

Muraki Kazutaka was a man of many faces. To most people, he was a respectable, hard-working doctor, a good citizen dedicated to helping people. Some viewed him as an angel, a savior. Others saw the opposite side of him, the demented murderer who's main goal in life was to revive his dead half-brother so that he could kill him with his own two hands, harming many in the process and not giving a second thought to taking the life of another. Then, there was another side of him, a side that only one young woman ever saw, that only she brought out in him.

Sakuraiji Ukyou never knew of the horrible crimes her fiancé committed. Kazutaka wouldn't allow her to. He kept his illegal activities a secret from her, but never distanced himself from her. He balanced his differing lifestyles while keeping her totally oblivious. To Ukyou, he was a wonderful doctor, a kind man, and a patient lover. Kazutaka knew full well that Ukyou had an intense fear of a man's touch. He could tell even before she told him simply by the way she would keep a physical distance between them even when they were dating. Yet, he never rushed her. He eased her into things, first letting his fingertips brush her arm, then giving her hand a quick and gentle squeeze, working into holding hands, and finally into full hugs. Ukyou apologized repeatedly for her fear, but Kazutaka never blamed her for it. He accepted her and loved her as she was. He waited for physical affections, supporting her and calmly pushing her forward in a way that gradually helped her to be able to touch him without making her too uncomfortable. He never forced her and always accepted when she wasn't ready to move to the next step. Ukyou was eternally grateful to him. Kazutaka was also grateful to her.

Despite all that he had been through during his childhood, when he was around Ukyou, he could forget about his half-brother, forget about Shinigami, forget about revenge. Ukyou was his anchor to sanity. Being with her was the only way for him to hold on to who he was, who he could have been.

As such, he would never let her know of his illegal activities. He loved her too much to do that to her. He did, however, know that he would not be able to keep her safe all the time. Once he began finalizing his plans for his revenge, he had a feeling he would not be returning, at least not anytime soon. Thus, he left the task of protecting is precious Ukyou to the one man he knew he could trust: his best friend, Oriya. The three of them had been good friends since their school days, and he knew that Oriya would do everything in his power to protect Ukyou. He was the one other man the girl could trust, and the only other person Kazutaka could trust. She would be safe in his hands, and she would never know about the dark side of Kazutaka. She would always remain the innocent woman she was, protected by the two most important men in her life. She would always be all Kazutaka ever truly loved.


	7. Budget Cuts

_**Summary**: Due to a weakening economy, Tatsumi decides to make some cuts to the Shokan division's budget.  
_

_**Rating**: K+  
_

_**Genre**:Humor  
_

_**Words**: 3,447  
_

_**Author's Note**: The result of an IM conversation with Naotoki Yamaouchi. She was mentioning how Tatsumi is so cheap, he wouldn't even buy a can opener, and so I just had to write a one-shot about Tatsumi making some cuts to the budget. Enjoy the insanity.  
_

* * *

It was ten past nine in the morning, and the Shokan division was gathered in the meeting room for an important budget meeting. Tsuzuki was sitting with his elbow on the table, chin resting on his hand. He let out a loud yawn and started to close his eyes, but was abruptly elbowed in his side by his partner.

"Tsuzuki!" Hisoka whispered harshly. "Don't doze off, pay attention!"

"But I'm tired...it's too early for a meeting..."

"If you're always so tired in the morning, maybe you should go to bed earlier. You complain every single morning."

"Not my fault work is so early..."

"It's work, you're a big boy, deal with it."

"But-"

"Ahem!" Tatsumi cleared his throat rather loudly in the front of the room, fully silencing Tsuzuki and Hisoka's quiet bickering. The two quickly turned to the secretary, Tsuzuki now sitting erect, making sure to pay attention so as not to anger Tatsumi further. He'd already had one cut to his paycheck in the last 7 days, he didn't need another one.

"As you all know..." Tatsumi began, looking over everyone in the room before continuing, "the economy has been weakening considerably over the past few months. After careful planning, I have decided there are some things we need to cut from our budget in order to save money. First off, coffee will be limited to one cup per morning." There was an outcry from a few people, including the chief, to which Tatsumi simply held his hand up for silence. "Please understand, the consumption of coffee in the office is far greater than it needs to be. One cup should be enough for everyone. If you feel you need more, then you will have to bring your own, and if you need coffee to keep you awake during working hours, then you need to go to bed earlier.

"Second, sweets will not be available in the break room."

"What?!" Tsuzuki burst out, pushing himself up from his chair.

Tatsumi threw a glare at Tsuzuki. "Tsuzuki-san, you are the main reason I am making this rule. Sweets are an unnecessary food and don't need to be provided at work. If you want some, you can bring in your own." He turned to the Chief, who was also not at all happy at this second cut. "However, Chief Konoe, we can afford one small sweet a day for you."

"That's not fair!" Tsuzuki whined.

"Not fair? Need I remind you, Tsuzuki-san, that the Chief is the one in charge of our division and does far more work than the rest of us, especially you."

Tsuzuki sunk back into his chair, pouting. Hisoka tried not to smile, glad that Tsuzuki's supply of sweets would be interrupted. The man ate far too many.

Tatsumi continued, "In order to keep up our library," Hisoka's attention snapped over to Tatsumi at the mention of the library, "Anyone who takes books out of the library will be charged a small fee per book. Any books that haven't been returned after a week will be charged a late fee per day."

Hisoka stared. "You are kidding...right?"

"I'm afraid not, Kurosaki-kun. The library needs money in order to be kept up-to-date, and we have a rather large library, which requires more money for upkeep."

The youngest Shinigami scowled while his partner continued to pout. Tatsumi kept going.

"Any work not related to our jobs as Shinigami will not be funded for any reason. This includes, but is not limited to, the creation of new machines, science experiments, computer games, the copying or printing of non-work related documents, and office parties." He glanced at Watari, whose normally cheery grin had completely vanished.

"Any property damage caused by any employee for any reason will be paid upfront." Terazuma glared, knowing this comment was directed at him. "Any cooking is to be completed at home with ingredients from home." Wakaba frowned. She loved making treats for everyone in the office, and they just weren't the same if they weren't fresh.

Tatsumi looked over everyone in the room, none of whom were happy in the least. "That is all for now. If we require further budget cuts, I will inform everyone." He smiled. "Enjoy your day!"

Everyone got up and left the room, grumbling, pouting and complaining. Tatsumi didn't seemed bothered by it at all.

"Are you sure this is a good idea, Tatsumi?" The chief asked.

Tatsumi nodded. "It is for the good of our division and Enmacho as a whole."

Konoe sighed. "I hope you are right."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Argh! That Tatsumi!" Tsuzuki yelled once he had gotten to his office. "He acts like he runs the place!How am I supposed to concentrate throughout the day if I have to go out of my way to get any kind of sweets?!"

"Please. As if you don't eat enough of them." Hisoka said, rolling his eyes.

"But I _like _them! What's wrong with eating something you like?"

"Nothing, it's when you eat too much of it that it becomes a problem. You'll live." Hisoka suddenly stopped writing. "Uh-oh...I left that library book at home...it's been a week since I borrowed it."

"So bring it back tomorrow."

"No, Tsuzuki, remember what Tatsumi said? All library books will be charged a late fee if kept over a week."

"But he shouldn't start that now, you didn't know you were going to have to pay if you didn't return it. Shouldn't it be your next book that gets charged?"

Hisoka turned to face Tsuzuki. "Tsuzuki, this is Tatsumi we are talking about. Why the hell would he charge me to rent out books anyway? He knows I visit all the time, I don't want to have to cut back on reading to avoid spending my entire paycheck at the library! Reading is actually good for you, why would he take that away?!"

Tsuzuki grumbled, "Because he's a money-grubbing tightwad."

Hisoka sighed in aggravation. "I'll get it during lunch break..."

"Then what about your lunch?"

"I'll grab something quick to eat." Hisoka turned back to his work, not wanting to talk anymore. Tsuzuki took the hint and turned to his own work with a loud sigh.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"How dare he." Terazuma growled. "The jerk looked right at me when he talked about property damage. As if I'm the only one who causes it. It's not even my fault, it's friggin' Kuroshungei!" He looked over at Wakaba, who's normally cheery demeanor had been taken down a couple of notches, and grew more angry. Tatsumi had some nerve upsetting Wakaba like that. Terazuma clenched his fists, having a sudden urge to punch Tatsumi in the face. Kuroshungei responded to his anger and began pushing for control. Terazuma stopped his rant and focused his attention on keeping his Shikigami back. Wakaba was at his side immediately, ofuda in hand and ready to help Terazuma if needed. Luckily for them, Terazuma didn't need it, and held of Kuroshungei on his own.

"I'm alright, Kannuki."

Wakaba smiled. "Just making sure!" She sighed. "I'll just have to make goodies at home and time it so that they are still nice and fresh when we come into work. Maybe I'll take some in tomorrow morning to cheer everyone up, nobody looked very happy when we left the meeting."

"Maybe we'll get lucky and the Chief will fire him."

"Hajime!"

"What? He deserves it!"

"He's trying to look out for the good of our division. I'm sure he has good intentions."

Terazuma snorted. "Hah! He's just trying to save more money by aggravating the rest of us. He doesn't have our best interests in mind."

"Maybe we can help him figure out other ways to save money. We'll think of something!"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When lunchtime rolled around, nobody in the office was any happier. Tsuzuki's grumpiness had only increased due to lack of sugar, and Hisoka certainly hadn't been happy about going back home to retrieve his library book to return.

Tsuzuki put a can of soup up to the can opener, held the can in place with one hand, and pressed down on the lever of the can opener with the other. The can opener didn't respond. Tsuzuki looked at the wall to make sure it was plugged in, and confirmed it was indeed plugged into an electrical socket. Thinking maybe there was something wrong with the outlet, Tsuzuki moved the can opener to another one and tried that. Still nothing. He growled and turned around to see Tatsumi about to leave the break room.

"Tatsumi! The can opener is busted! We need another one!"

Tatsumi walked over and tried the can opener again to make sure it wasn't just Tsuzuki. When it didn't work, he shrugged. "Just use a knife."

"You're not going to get another can opener?"

"Why spend the money on a can opener when we can just use something we already have?" With that, he walked away, leaving Tsuzuki to deal with opening his can of soup.

Tsuzuki huffed and searched for a knife. When he found one, he tried stabbing it through the top of the can, but only made a dent in it.

"Stupid Tatsumi." Tsuzuki growled, "How much could it possibly cost for a can opener?! I swear, he's purposely trying to make our lives misera- YEOW!" Tsuzuki dropped the knife, which had slipped when he tried stabbing the can again, leaving a gash in his hand. He grabbed a paper towel and gently pressed it to the wound, hissing from the pain. "Owww..."

Wakaba, who had been on the way to the break room with Terazuma when she heard Tsuzuki's yelp and ran over. "Tsuzuki! Are you okay?" She looked from his hand to the bloodied knife and frowned. "What happened?"

"Tatsumi happened! The can opener was broken, but since Mr. Penny-Pincher doesn't want to spend a couple of extra bucks to buy a new can opener, he told me to just use a knife. So I did. It slipped and I cut my hand."

"Nice one." Terazuma said, earning a glare from Tsuzuki.

The wound was already almost healed, but Wakaba wasn't happy. "I'll buy a nice can opener, using a knife is too dangerous."

"Only if you're a total klutz like Tsuzuki."

"Hajime! Be nice!"

"A can-opener you say?" Watari's voice suddenly called out from behind them.

Tsuzuki turned to face him. "Yeah, this one is busted and Tatsumi won't buy a new one."

"I know just the solution! Give me just a few minutes!" With that, Watari scurried off, presumably to his lab.

"He's gonna get his ass kicked if Tatsumi finds out he used money to create another one of his stupid inventions." Terazuma said, watching the inventor run out of the room.

Watari came back about ten minutes later with a gadget in his hands, beaming. "I bring you: Jimmy The Robotic Can Opener! Also known simply as Jimmy!"

Tsuzuki looked at the device Watari was holding out. "How did you put that together so fast?"

"Oh, I've had it for a while, I just kept forgetting to get a plug for it. I made a break-through in my sex change potion and totally forgot I was working on this!" He walked over to the counter, placed Jimmy down, and plugged him in. "Alright, give him your can of soup, Tsuzuki!"

Tsuzuki moved the soup can over to the robot, expecting to work it like any other can opener, when Jimmy suddenly reached out with it's robotic arms, took the can from Tsuzuki, and pulled it closer to itself. What was supposed to be its bottom jaw slid back, revealing a sharp wheel. The wheel shot down, piercing the top of the can. Once that was done, something in the hands began turning the can.

Watari clapped in delight. "It works! It works!"

Jimmy finished opening the can and dropped it onto the counter. Tsuzuki, happy to finally have his can of soup open, reached for it. Just before his fingers wrapped around the can, however, Jimmy's little hands grabbed onto Tsuzuki's thumb and pinky, lifted them up, and proceeded to work as if Tsuzuki's hand was a can. He yelped as the machine's sharp wheel embedded itself in his previously uninjured hand and yanked it back, knocking the machine to the ground at Tsuzuki's feet. The machine then latched into Tsuzuki's pant leg. Tsuzuki kicked the machine back.

"Oops." Watari said, looking at the fresh cut in Tsuzuki's hand. "Guess I have to work on it some more."

Jimmy wasn't done, however. It lifted itself upright and began moving forward with wheels that were installed underneath it. Tsuzuki stepped back, and the can opener moved faster.

"Aaah! It's out to get me!" Tsuzuki yelled, running toward the doorway. "How is it still working?!"

"Oh, it has batteries too, in case there is a power-outage and you still need to open a can!" Watari bent down to pick Jimmy up, but he, too, was attacked by the machine.

"Yeow!" Watari yelled, and stumbled back to the doorway with Tsuzuki. Jimmy rolled quickly toward them, and the two Shinigami turned around and ran, leaving Terazuma and Wakaba to stare at the now-empty doorway in disbelief.

"Do we help?" Wakaba asked her partner.

Terazuma shook his head. "Nah, they can figure it out themselves."

"Mayday! Mayday! Attacking can opener!" Watari yelled, running through the halls alongside Tsuzuki, Jimmy hot on their trail.

"Watari! Why did you give it wheels?! Can openers don't need to move!"

"I thought it'd come in handy!"

"Handy for keeping people far away from it maybe!"

The two rounded a corner, almost falling over from their less than graceful turn. Up ahead was Hisoka, who had just returned from the library.

"Hisoka!" Tsuzuki yelled. "Run! Killer can opener!"

Hisoka turned around. "What the hell are you-" He didn't have time to finish his sentence, because Tsuzuki and Watari were getting closer and clearly had no intention of stopping. "Woah!" He turned around and began to run just before the two older Shinigami ran right into him. "What is going on?!"

"I told you! Killer can opener!"

Hisoka got between Tsuzuki and Watari to avoid being run over and stopped running. "Stop being ridiculous! There is no such thing as-" Before he could finish his sentence, Jimmy had latched on to his jeans and began tearing into them. "What the hell?! Get off of me!" He shook his leg violently, trying to dislodge the machine, but it wasn't letting go. "Watari! I know this is your fault! Now get it off of me!"

Watari rushed over to Hisoka's aid, wrapping both hands around the machine to pry it off, but his index finger had been a bit too close to the machine's round blade, and it began cutting at Watari's finger, actually digging down to the bone. Watari yelped and released the machine, but Jimmy still wasn't releasing Hisoka. Growling in frustration, Hisoka tried stomping on the machine with his free foot. Unfortunately, Jimmy's motion sensor caught the movement of Hisoka's foot rising into the air and the machine let go and rolled away just before Hisoka brought his foot down, causing the Shinigami to stomp on his own foot. "OW!"

Jimmy rolled around Hisoka, as if laughing at him. More frustrated than ever, not to mention embarrassed at being teased by a machine, Hisoka aimed a swift kick at it, sending the machine flying through the air. Hisoka's kick had been a bit too good, however, and Jimmy connected with Tsuzuki's head before the Shinigami had a chance to move. Tsuzuki fell backwards, Jimmy landing inches from his head, sparking and twitching.

"Ow, ow, ow!" Tsuzuki said, sitting up and rubbing his head where Jimmy had collided with it.

Hisoka sighed and crouched down beside Tsuzuki. "Idiot, why didn't you move?"

Tsuzuki whimpered. "I didn't have a chance!"

"Let me see." Hisoka yanked Tsuzuki's hand away from his head. There was a large bruise which was already forming a small bump.

"Maybe you should get some ice for that." Watari suggested.

Hisoka turned on Watari with a glare. "Maybe YOU should get some ice, seeing as it's YOUR stupid invention."

"Alright, I'll get it!" Watari ran down the corridor, heading for the break room to get some ice.

"What is going on?" Tatsumi asked, stepping into the hall after hearing all of the commotion and looking down at Tsuzuki, Hisoka and the machine.

Hisoka pointed to Watari's dying machine. "That. It...er...attacked my leg...and when I kicked it, it hit Tsuzuki in the head."

Tatsumi blinked. "It...attacked you?"

Hisoka blushed in embarrassment and showed his the bottom of his left pant-leg, which was torn in several places. "It was apparently supposed to be a can opener, but we all know what happens when Watari creates something."

Tatsumi pinched the bridge of his nose. He was going to kill Watari. "Where is Watari now?"

"Getting ice for the bump forming on Tsuzuki's head."

"Alright, got it!" Watari's voice called out. He stopped as soon as he saw Tatsumi. "Oh. Hey there, Tatsumi."

"Watari. Take your...thing...take it apart, and get back to work."

Even Watari knew better than to question Tatsumi when the secretary was angry. He handed Tsuzuki the bag of ice, which was wrapped in a facecloth, grabbed the dying Jimmy, and quickly made his way back to his paperwork.

Tsuzuki gingerly placed the bag of ice to his head, hoping it would numb the area until the pain receded. Today was not his day.

Hisoka noticed the almost-healed cuts on Tsuzuki's hands. "_Now_ will you reconsider your ridiculous budget cuts?" he asked, looking straight at Tatsumi.

Tatsumi looked taken back for a brief moment, not at all having expected Hisoka to be so outright in telling him that he thought his budget cuts were ridiculous. Perhaps he did go a _little _overboard...

"Alright, I'll buy a can opener. But not an electric one, we can use a regular hand one."

"Fine. What about the library?" Hisoka said, standing up.

"What about it?"

"I shouldn't have to pay money to rent out books. If the Gushoshin need money _that_ badly, we can find another way to help it. I'll donate, if I have to."

Tatsumi hesitated. "Alright...we can discuss it with the Gushoshin."

Hisoka wondered why the Gushoshin hadn't been at the meeting in the first place. He guessed that they weren't really having much of a budget problem at all and Tatsumi was exaggerating the need for budget cuts.

"The rest of the rules, however, will stay in place."

"My head hurts..." Tsuzuki whimpered, "I want apple pie..."

"I think you should call for another meeting to negotiate these budget cuts with us all, Tatsumi." Hisoka said, ignoring Tsuzuki's complaints.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Thanks to Hisoka's persisting, another meeting had been called. The group had come to the agreement that each person would take a turn purchasing coffee for the office, which, Tatsumi decided, would discourage them from drinking it excessively. The same went with sweets- if anybody wanted, they could buy snacks for the whole office to share. Wakaba, however, was allowed to once again bake during her break time, so long as she used her own ingredients (which she took advantage of, cooking up a nice apple pie right after the meeting, much to Tsuzuki's pleasure). Property damage was still to be paid up-front, and anybody who didn't have enough money would lose a large chunk of their paycheck until the damage was paid off. Computers were to be put into sleep mode when not in use for any longer than a half hour during the day and made sure to be shut down when work ended.

All in all, everyone was satisfied (with, perhaps, the exception of Tatsumi), and life around the office went back to normal. Or, as normal as things could be in the Shokan Division.


	8. When Google Gives You Lemons

_**Summary**: A bout of boredom leads Tsuzuki to do an internet search with his own name, but the results are something he never would have expected.  
_

_**Rating**: K+  
_

_**Genre**: Parody/Humor_

___**Words**: 1, 857  
_

_**Author's Note**: A short, silly story on what might happen if some of the Yami no Matsuei cast discovered fanfiction. Please note that this is not intended to offend or make fun of anyone or anyone's fanfictions! Any relation between the fanfiction mentioned in this one-shot and other existing fanfiction is purely coincidental- I made the story Tsuzuki finds up myself (not that I actually wrote the story he finds out...you'll see.). This is just for fun! I'm sure I'd be one of the people on Hisoka's hitlist if he discovered I wrote stories about him and Tsuzuki. =P  
_

* * *

Tsuzuki sighed out of boredom. He was supposed to be typing up a report from his and Hisoka's last mission, but he was halfway through and wanted a break. Unfortunately, it was not break time, and Tatsumi would scold him and cut his pay if he decided to take one. There was still a way to entertain himself, however: a wonderful thing known as the internet. Glancing around, Tsuzuki confirmed nobody was paying attention to him. Hisoka seemed absorbed in his work, and there was nobody else in their office. With a small grin, Tsuzuki opened his computer's internet browser and starting 'surfing the web', as he often heard people calling it.

There was the usual news articles that popped up at the homepage, most of which Tsuzuki didn't want to read since most news was about somebody being hurt or killed...or worse, large amounts of people being hurt and killed. The articles were worth looking through though, because sometimes he'd find really cute, heartwarming articles, or sometimes funny things on animals. Browsing through them now, however, didn't bring up anything particularly interesting.

Having nothing else to do, Tsuzuki decided to try something else. Going to Google, Tsuzuki typed his own name into the search engine. It was simple curiosity to see what would come up, though he highly doubted he'd find anything.

Surprisingly enough, his name had gotten him results. The first thing that came up was to a website called ''. Curious, he clicked the link. It brought up a story that apparently starred himself and Hisoka. Since when were there stories written about them? And who would write them? The Gushoshin twins? Why? The description read simply, 'A Tsuzuki and Hisoka lemon.' The description confused him. What did lemons have to do with either of them? Besides, he liked sweets, not really sour fruits! Wondering what it was about, Tsuzuki read on.

It started out simple enough: Tsuzuki and Hisoka were returning home from a normal day at work, ready to eat dinner and relax for the rest of the night. It all sounded like their actual, every-day life, other than the fact they apparently lived together in the story when, in actuality, they had their own separate homes. Though, the idea was appealing. Except Tsuzuki was sure that Hisoka would hate to move in with him, and wouldn't be too keen on him moving in with Hisoka. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea. It would be nice to live with somebody else though...it got lonely living alone for so long. Maybe he could bring it up to Hisoka sometime in the future.

Pushing that thought aside, Tsuzuki continued reading. After dinner, the two decided to snuggle with each other on the couch. Well, that wasn't something that Hisoka willingly did. Not often, anyway. In fact, the only time Hisoka would hug him was when one of them needed comfort. That was the only sort of cuddling Hisoka ever did. Tsuzuki couldn't really blame him, given his past and his empathetic abilities, though he did think the boy needed more hugs.

After the two cuddled for a while in the story, they started to kiss. Tsuzuki found this to be even more uncharacteristic of Hisoka. Thinking about it, he figured his partner had probably never kissed anybody in his life, and certainly not in his afterlife. While he had had that short fling with Tsubaki on one of their cases, that was...well, not something either Tsuzuki or Hisoka tried to think about, with how tragic it turned out and how much Hisoka had been hurt in the end. That had been one of those times Hisoka had needed the comfort and accepted a long hug from Tsuzuki.

Now, Tsuzuki was wondering who wrote this story and where they would come up with the idea that Hisoka would kiss him. He was beginning to hope it was some odd joke, because it was starting to get creepy. Reading further on, Tsuzuki decided to carry Hisoka to bed. Oh, well, that was fairly normal. Hisoka had passed out a few times before where Tsuzuki ended up having to carry him to bed to rest. Tsuzuki was pretty sure Hisoka in the story was still awake, but figured he was just tired, so his story self had decided to bring him to bed. The kissing didn't seem to stop when they got there, however, which started making things confusing. What was going on with this story? And why were clothes coming off now? There was nothing abnormal about getting undressed to get pajamas on before bed, but he and Hisoka undressing each other certainly wasn't normal. As it began to dawn on him just what he was reading, Tsuzuki grew increasingly worried and creeped out, for the story Tsuzuki and Hisoka were now both completely naked and...

"Tsuzuki, what are you doing?"

Tsuzuki almost fell out of his seat, jumping at the sound of Hisoka's voice right behind him. "N-nothing! I mean...I'm working! Yeah, working!"

Hisoka was unconvinced. "Working...then why did you stop typing? And why were you staring at the screen with your mouth hanging open...and why is your face so red? You didn't erase something important again...did you?"

As Hisoka leaned to the side to try to get a look at the screen, Tsuzuki quickly stood up and blocked it with his body. "No! I didn't era-I mean...uh...yeah, I accidentally erased my report...but I'll just type it up again! No harm done!"

"Then why are you covering the screen? Move out of the way."

"Uh...I don't think that's a good idea..."

"You are obviously doing something wrong that you don't want me to know about, now move!"

Hisoka grabbed Tsuzuki by the shoulders and tried yanking him away from the computer screen, and the elder replied by throwing his arms around it, refusing to let it go.

"You idiot, let go! You are going to break the monitor!"

"If you stop trying to pull me off, then it won't break!"

"Tsuzuki! Let go, now!"

Finally, Hisoka managed to get Tsuzuki away from the computer screen, pushing him so that his chair rolled to the side with him on it and granted Hisoka access. He was confused when he simply saw words on the screen. "Why did you get so uppity about-"

Hisoka's eyes landed on a sentence toward the bottom of the screen, 'Hisoka wrapped his arms around his lover, a moan escaping him as Tsuzuki...' That was all Hisoka had to read. He felt his entire face turn red as he stared at Tsuzuki in disbelief of what the older man had been reading.

"Tsuzuki! What the hell- how did- where did- why are you- that's...that's just...AUGH!"

"No, Hisoka! It's not what you think! Wait!" Tsuzuki called, but his partner had already stormed out of the office. Tsuzuki dropped his head on his desk and groaned. Wonderful. Now Hisoka thought he was some creepy, disgusting pervert like Muraki. He would have to explain exactly how this had happened, because this was most definitely _not_ something he could let there be a misunderstanding about. Not if he had any hope of Hisoka speaking to him ever again. Or even being in the same room as him. Or the same building, for that matter.

Who on earth would write such a thing anyway? Scrolling all the way up the page, Tsuzuki looked around for any possible sources. The click of a link led him to an even more disturbing discovery. There, listed in front of him, were a bunch more stories involving them as well as the other Shinigami, and even Muraki. He stared at the screen in horror, not realizing Tatsumi had walked in until the secretary spoke.

"Tsuzuki-san, is something wrong?"

Tsuzuki once again nearly jumped out of his seat. In haste to get rid of the evidence of what he had been reading, he accidentally clicked the minimize button on the web browser, but, thinking he closed it, left it and turned around. "No, nothing's wrong!"

"Are you sure? Because Kurosaki-kun just stomped down the hall and didn't answer me when I asked him what was wrong. I don't think I've ever seen him so flustered before. Did you mess something up on the computer?" Tatsumi suddenly had a dangerous glint in his eyes. "Tsuzuki-san...I hope you didn't erase all the important files in the computer..."

"No! I didn't erase anything! I just- I have to go talk to Hisoka." Without any more explanation, Tsuzuki stood up and ran out the door, hoping to catch Hisoka and get him to understand what had happened before the younger Shinigami asked the Chief to partner him with somebody else.

Tatsumi looked at Tsuzuki's computer screen. He figured Tsuzuki had to have done something wrong. Why else would he be so nervous while his partner was stomping down the halls? Seeing a window minimized, Tatsumi sat down on Tsuzuki's chair and brought it up. His eyebrows raised in confusion as he saw a list of what were apparently stories, all of which were written about the employees of the Shokan Division, and, in some instances, Muraki. What on earth was this?

Hoping to get to the bottom of this, Tatsumi clicked on one of them, which happened to star himself and Watari. His eyes widened as he read what was written. "What is this?! I have done no such thing with Watari! Who wrote this?! I swear, when I find the person responsible, I'm giving them a one-way ticket to the Shadow Dimension!"

---Meanwhile---

Having nothing to do, Muraki decided to entertain himself with the computer. He missed Tsuzuki- it had been several weeks since he last saw his most prized doll, and wanted to see him again. There was nothing that could be done at the moment, however, so instead he brought up Google and typed in the Shinigami's name. He clicked on the first search result. When it led him to a story, he was rather surprised, but decided to read.

Did Tsuzuki really do that with the boy? If the boy was as willing as this story described, then he clearly had not done his job properly enough that night under the cherry blossom tree. An interesting find, but not what he was looking for. Clicking another link toward the top of the page, Muraki found a list of stories. It didn't take much browsing before he found one that starred himself and Tsuzuki. He found it to be given a rating of 'M', so it held promise. Clicking on the title, Muraki began reading. A smirk spread across his face.

When he finished reading, Muraki made sure to go back and bookmark the website. There were more stories where that came from, and he was interested in reading them. He shut his computer down for the night, however, as there was something more important he now had to do- figure out his next plot to get his darling Tsuzuki to him.


	9. Mother

_**Summary: **"Soon, you will be a lifeless corpse, no different from the dolls you collected. I am your toy no longer."_

_**Rating: **T_

_**Genre:** Horror_

_**Character**: Muraki Kazutaka_

_**Words:** 654_

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A flash of metal. A scream of horror. A dull thud. Fresh blood seeping out, slowly covering the floor. Dead silence.

Ah, Mother, your precious doll has finally struck back. I bet you never expected that, did you? After all, how could your darling Kazutaka, the most precious of your collection, betray you?

Most precious doll...that is where you were wrong. I'm not a toy for you to play with as you please. I've seen what you do to your dolls. When you are done with them, you throw them away. Once you find a nicer one, you toss them aside, just as you did to my favorite doll, Veronica. I won't be disposed of so easily.

I could see how you looked at Saki. Even though he wasn't yours, even though he was a bastard child from another woman that your low-life husband impregnated while I was in your womb, you thought he was a beautiful doll. Would you have replaced me with him? Maybe you wouldn't have, but I can't take that chance, now could I? Don't worry, Mother, I'll take good care of Saki. He will shatter beautifully. But, I wouldn't worry about him right now, if you are thinking of him at all.

Have you looked outside, Mother? The moon is a beautiful shade of crimson, the same shade as the blood draining out of your body. I wonder if you can see it, now that you are dying. I can always see it, but it seems I am the only one. Nobody else seems to notice. It's a shame, because this red moon...it is invigorating. Now, watching you die, feeling your warm blood seeping into the cloth of my pants as I kneel beside you, it fills me with so much energy. I've been wanting to kill you for so long, but I never imagined it would feel this wonderful. Is it all just because I have finally succeeded in killing you, or is it something else as well?

Mother, you have given birth to a monster. I'm not quite human, am I? Of course, I was never a human to you anyway. I was simply a doll to you, so I suppose this revelation is lost upon you. Perhaps this you will understand: your beloved doll has been possessed by a demon. Does that help you understand? Though, even that isn't quite right. I am not possessed, for I know full well what I am doing. I suppose there is nothing you will understand properly, you aren't sane enough. A sane person would not treat her own son as nothing more than porcelain and cloth. Perhaps none of us are sane. This dysfunctional family...no, we aren't a family, we simply posed as one. What we had could not be called a family. It was more of a collection of people. Unfortunately for you, it is a collection I do not want. You are a broken doll, I have no more use for you.

Yes, that's right, you are the doll, my dear Mother, and you are broken beyond repair. A shattered doll is worthless, and can no longer be a part of the collection. How does it feel to have your own thoughts and actions turned back on you?

Are you crying, Mother? Surely it's because of the physical pain. You don't have enough emotion to cry for your son, to cry for what you've done. But still, how your tears bring a smile to my face. You could never understand the bliss this brings me, bathing in your blood under the light of the crimson moon, watching your life slowly fade. It's almost as if your life is flowing into me, making you weaker but me more powerful.

Ah, you've almost reached your end. Soon, you will be a lifeless corpse, no different from all the dolls you collected. I am your toy no longer.

Goodbye, Mother.


	10. Green

_**Summary:** Tsuzuki loved the color green. It was a pretty color, the color of nature, the color of life, and the color a certain something else._

_**Rating:** K+_

_**Genre:** General/Romance_

_**Characters:** Tsuzuki Asato, Kurosaki Hisoka**  
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_**Words:** 641_

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"Isn't green such a wonderful color?" Tsuzuki asked, leaning back in the grass, his weight supported by his arms behind him.

Hisoka shrugged. "A color is just a color if you ask me. Why do you like green so much anyway?"

"It's the color of life. Just look at all the plants- when they are alive there's always green. The grass is green, the leaves on the trees are green, the stems of flowers are green..." He trailed off for a brief moment, purple eyes glancing over the field the pair was taking a break at. The tall grass waved in the gentle breeze, giving off a serene, peaceful feeling. "Nature has a lot of green. It has other colors too, of course, but the plants are green, and other living things need to eat plants to survive. That, and I just think it's a nice color."

"Huh." The younger Shinigami watched the grass flow in the breeze. He'd never thought about it that way before, but, when Tsuzuki put it like that, he did have a point. Hisoka himself preferred blue, simply because it was a calming color and easy on the eyes to look at. Glancing up at the sky, he couldn't help but find it a little funny that he preferred the blue of the sky while Tsuzuki preferred the green of the grass. Opposites, as usual, and quite a distance apart.

Tsuzuki caught Hisoka's gaze and followed it up to the cloudless sky. "You like blue, right?"

"Mm. It's calm, relaxing, quiet."

"The blue sky is quite nice too. It's so far away, yet we all still reach up to touch it." Tsuzuki raised one of his arms up, fingers outstretched toward the sky. There his arm lingered for a moment, before he dropped it down and resumed his previous position.

"And opposite the green grass. The two are so far apart, and never meant to meet."

At this, the elder Shinigami grinned. "True. But, for a truly beautiful scene, you can't have one without the other. Besides, they aren't always so far apart. Once they travel down the path into the distance enough together, you can see where the grass and sky finally meet."

Hisoka looked into the distance, down the field they were currently sitting in, emerald eyes fixed on the horizon. Tsuzuki was right- if there was nothing in the way, once you looked down far enough, it seemed as if the grass and sky finally came together. They weren't supposed to be able to touch each other, and, technically, they still didn't, but it was also unavoidable to see the two together. It was only an illusion, however, since, if one should walk that far and reach that point of attention, the sky and grass would still be separated. Though, perhaps, there were rare points, when the ground rose up higher and higher until the grass was finally able to touch that distant, elusive sky.

Tsuzuki looked over at his partner, who seemed lost in thought. While it was quite normal for Hisoka to be quiet, even he had a serene sort of look on his face. His expression was a little softer than it usually was, his usual scowl absent. The purple-eyed man watched the breeze blow sandy-blonde strands of hair in and out of Hisoka's eyes, partially blocking them from view, but then revealing that green all over again.

"Green really is a lovely color."

Hisoka broke his gaze to face his partner, whose voice had brought his attention back. He found Tsuzuki looking right at him, the green of nature suddenly seemingly ignored for something else of the same color

Tsuzuki smiled. There was another, recent reason he loved the color green, and it was looking right at him.


	11. Heat

_**Summary:** It's way too hot in Meifu, the air conditioning in the Shokan Division has broken down, and tempers are on the rise.  
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_**Rating:** K+_

_**Genre:** Comedy_

_**Characters:** Kurosaki Hisoka  
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_**Words:** 3,196  
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_**Author's Note:** So, I started writing this months ago, just before summer had started, on a particularly hot day when I was stuck outside waiting for a bus that never came. It is now November and cold out. Don't ask why it took so long, because I don't have a valid reason. I just kind of...left it for a while, I'm not even sure why. But, here it is finally, completed. Maybe reading about such a hot day will make you glad the weather is cooling down. Or make you miss the summer as you are shivering under a blanket in front of a heater. I dunno. Anyway, hope you enjoy it. Thank you as always to those who have reviewed!_

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Hot. It was way too hot. Summer hadn't even begun yet, and the temperature was already too much to handle. Then, if that hadn't been enough, the air conditioning system controlling the area of the building the Shokan Division occupied had gone on the fritz, and all attempts to repair it failed. Hisoka was beginning to believe that he was no longer a Shinigami, and had instead been sent to Hell for some terrible crime he didn't commit. Everything around him was just an illusion concocted by the devil himself in order to torture Hisoka. Tsuzuki's whining was grating on his nerves, Watari's complaining about the humidity making his hair an uncontrollable mess made him want to shave the wannabe scientist bald, Terazuma inciting fights with Tsuzuki was tempting him to sew the former's mouth shut, and the heat...oh, the heat! The glasses of ice cold water did little to help, and he couldn't fan himself while filling out paperwork (not that that would do too much either). Yep, he had definitely been dragged to Hell while he was sleeping. The only possible thing that could make it worse was if the Demonic Duo, Saya and Yuma, decided to visit. Hisoka could only pray to whatever kind deity that was listening that those two would not appear.

Tsuzuki was currently tapping his pen on his desk, sighing and moaning about the heat. Hisoka was doing his best to ignore him and keep working, but it always seemed impossible to ignore something when one was aggravated and trying to work. The young Shinigami gripped his pen and clenched his teeth, trying not to scream at his annoying partner, which was getting increasingly difficult. If Tsuzuki made one more sound-

And then there was a large sigh.

"Will you just shut up and do your work?" Hisoka finally snapped, "We all know it's hot! Stop whining about it and just work!"

Tsuzuki pouted. "But, Hisoka, it's too hot to work!"

"If the rest of us have to sit in this heat and work, so do you!"

That seemed to shut Tsuzuki up, as he stopped talking and went back to his paperwork. Blessed silence fell for the next half hour until it was break time. Hisoka heard Tsuzuki get up, but he had no intentions of getting up himself. He could get more work done if Tsuzuki was out of the room and not being a distraction, so he planned on taking advantage of it.

"Hey, Hisoka, it's break time." When Hisoka didn't respond, Tsuzuki spoke louder. "Hisoka! Break!"

"I know. I don't care." The young Shinigami grumbled, continuing his work.

Tsuzuki frowned. "Come on, you need a break. Come get some lunch."

"Not hungry." The heat had sapped Hisoka of his appetite, so lunch wasn't at all appealing. Unfortunately for him, Tsuzuki wasn't about to take that as an answer.

"Well you have to eat something. It's not healthy for you to be skipping meals all the time, especially with your health."

"I'm. Not. Hungry." Hisoka said through gritted teeth.

Tsuzuki was suddenly at his partner's side. "You're eating anyway, just something small."

"I'm not a child, Tsuzuki! I can decide whether or not I want to eat! Leave me alone!"

"No, because if you decide, you'll just skip meals and get sick." Tsuzuki tugged on Hisoka's arm, trying to get him up from his chair.

Hisoka was ready to give Tsuzuki the verbal lashing of a lifetime, but he bit it back. "If I eat something, will you _leave me alone_ for the rest of the day and _stop complaining_?"

Tsuzuki sighed. "Fine, if you eat something, I won't say a word."

"Fine." Hisoka grumbled. The chances of Tsuzuki actually being quiet for the rest of the day were practically nonexistent, but, it was worth a try. As Hisoka stood up from his chair, he realized his shirt was clinging to his back. Wonderful. That was just another reason Hisoka hated the heat- it made him sweat. The combination of feeling hot and sticky was not a pleasant one. Sweating always made him feel so dirty and made him want to take a nice, cold shower. Unfortunately, he could not do that at work. What he could do was quickly go home and shower instead of eating during break. The problem with that was the relief would only be temporary and he'd start sweating again after he got back to work. Not only that, but he would no doubt be lectured by Tsuzuki for skipping a meal. Either way, it was a lose-lose situation. There was no satisfying option.

When they got to the break room, Tatsumi was filling a tall glass with cold water, and Kannuki and Terazuma were already sitting down, eating.

"Tatsumiiii," Tsuzuki whined, "Can't you do anything about this heat?"

Tatsumi looked at Tsuzuki from the corner of his eye in a way that made the older Shinigami take a step back. "If I could, Tsuzuki-san, the air conditioning would be working."

"What's the matter, can't take a little heat, Tsuzuki?" Terazuma teased.

Tsuzuki glared. "I can, but this is ridiculous."

Kannuki sighed. "Hajime, please. Don't argue. It's hot and we're all agitated because of it, we don't need any other reason to be upset."

It didn't take an empath to tell she was right, but Hisoka could most certainly confirm it. The room was teeming with agitation, which didn't help his own sense of aggravation any. He closed off his senses as much as he could, but there was still tension in the air that anybody could sense.

Unfortunately, neither Terazuma nor Tsuzuki took that as a reason to avoid arguing, and continued to bicker. Hisoka was ready to throw his glass at one of their heads, but stopped at an outburst from Tatsumi.

"If you two don't stop your incessant bickering this instant, I'm going to cut both of your pays!"

"He started it!" Both of the arguing Shinigami yelled at the same time, pointing to each other.

"I don't care you started it! You both took part, you're both going to be punished!"

"Hajime Terazuma!"

Terazuma froze and slowly turned to face Kannuki, who was now standing up, hands on her hips. She had used his full name, and that meant he was in trouble.

"You are acting like a little kid, knock it off!"

"But-"

Kannuki turned to Hisoka, smiled, and, in the sweetest voice, asked, "Kurosaki, I think Hajime needs help being escorted out of the room. Would you mind pulling him out of his chair by the hand, please?"

The idea almost brought a smile to Hisoka's face. The embarrassment he knew Terazuma felt from transforming when Hisoka touched him would be a good punishment for him. As soon as he looked at Terazuma, the horrified Shinigami stood up.

"That's okay! I don't need any help!"

"Good!" Kannuki said, still smiling sweetly. "Let us get back to work, Hajime-chan."

Defeated, Terazuma followed his partner out of the break room. Tsuzuki stuck his tongue out at him as he left. Unfortunately for Tsuzuki, Hisoka had seen the gesture, and gave Tsuzuki a swift whack upside his head.

"Ow!"

"I know it's difficult for you, but stop acting like a four-year-old."

Tsuzuki went silent after that, not daring to argue with an angry Hisoka.

The empath calmed slightly at Tsuzuki's silence, satisfied that his partner had finally heeded his warnings. All he had to do now was eat a small amount of food, and, hopefully, the man would be quiet for the rest of the day.

As soon as he sat down with a sandwich, however, the small hope he had for the day getting better shattered.

"I have a solution!" Watari yelled, standing triumphantly in the doorway. Hisoka twitched, and felt the dread coming from Tatsumi. Tsuzuki, however, grew excited.

"Did you figure out how to fix the air conditioner?" The purple-eyed Shinigami asked, a slight sparkle in his eyes at the thought of relief from the unbearable heat.

"No, but I did create something else! I call it: The Coolinator 1.0!" Watari said triumphantly while holding up what appeared to be a remote control.

"No." Tatsumi stated simply.

Watari pouted. "You don't even know what it does yet!"

"It doesn't matter what it does. We all know it will simply end up in failure and malfunction, just like everything else you do."

Watari gasped. "Are you...calling me a failure?"

"At experiments and creations...yes."

"T-Tatsumi! That's so cruel!"

"You're a meanie, Tatsumi!" Tsuzuki chimed in.

Tatsumi glared at Tsuzuki, causing him to sink into his chair. "I'm preventing impending doom. The air conditioners will be fine soon enough, you can all continue working until then."

Watari grinned and hit a button on the remote control. "Wwwoops, my finger slipped!"

The secretary's face dropped. "You didn't."

There was a distant beeping sound, followed by the sound of a rush of air. The Shinigami froze, half of them fearing what may happen while the other half were hopeful for the sweet feel of cold air. A few seconds later, a rush of cool air came from one of the vents. Hisoka was the first to feel it. He held his hand out, making sure he wasn't just feeling things and there actually was cool air coming towards him. His mouth dropped, closed again, and a look of contentment crossed his features, followed by a sigh of relief.

The cool air then spread to the other Shinigami. Tatsumi had a look of complete disbelief on his face, while both Tsuzuki and Watari broke out into large grins.

"You did it!" Tsuzuki yelled, throwing his arms around Watari. "Watari! You are the best!"

"I know! Hah hah, I told you it would work!"

The two hugged and hopped up and down like overly-giddy school girls, chanting "Cool air! Cool air!" Hisoka was fully content in his chair in front of the air vent, and Tatsumi was at a loss for words.

With a now comfortable temperature in the break room, the Shinigami proceeded to eat lunch. About halfway in, however, the air conditioning began to become too much.

"Watari-san, can you turn it down a little? I'm getting kind of cold now." Hisoka said, pulling his arms close to his body.

"Ah, yes, no problem!" He turned a dial on his remote-control and smiled. "That should do it."

"Thanks."

A few minutes later, and Hisoka wasn't feeling any better. In fact, he was getting colder. "Um...Watari? I think you turned it the wrong way. It's gotten colder."

"Oh, uh...let me turn it the other way, then."

Another minute later, and it still wasn't getting any warmer.

"Watari, are you sure you are turning the right dial?"

"There is only one dial."

Hisoka stared. "Don't tell me you can't change the temperature."

Watari waved his hand in the air. "Ah, it's no problem, I'll just turn it off!" He hit a switch once, twice, thrice, but the air conditioning did not turn off. "Errr..."

"Watari Yutaka, don't you dare say you can't turn it off!" Hisoka said, anger once again mounting.

"Okay, I won't."

Tatsumi adjusted his glasses in a way that caught the shine of the light above, giving him an even more menacing look than usual. "Watari, find a way to turn it off. Now."

No matter how many buttons he hit or how much he turned the dial, the temperature would not change, and the air conditioning would not turn off. "Seems The Coolinator 1.0 malfunctioned..."

Hisoka reached out and grabbed the remote control from the self-proclaimed scientist's hands. He tried everything he could think of, and, when nothing worked, he proceeded to throw the remote to the floor, shattering it.

"Gah! My remote control!"

When destroying the remote didn't stop the air conditioning, Hisoka turned on Watari.

"You had better go fix this right now! It is freezing in here!" Hisoka's breath was visible in the cold air as he spoke, the temperature continuing to drop.

"Alright, I'll go, I'll go!"

Wasting no more time to avoid being scolded by Tatsumi, Watari ran out of the room. Hisoka huddled in a ball on the couch, trying to keep himself warm.

"Is it any warmer in the hall?" He asked, hoping it was just this room that was freezing.

Tsuzuki stood up, walked into the hall, stayed there for a brief moment, and walked back into the break room. "Nope. Same out there as it is in here."

Tatsumi adjusted his glasses. "Watari Yutaka...the cost for all of this energy is coming directly out of your paycheck." He looked over at Tsuzuki and Hisoka. "It may take a while for him to get this fixed, you may want to get back to work."

Hisoka stared. "Work? We just went from weather that was way too hot, to below freezing in a matter of minutes. I'm dressed for the heat, I do not have a jacket with me, and I can see my own breath. I'm not working until this is fixed."

Tatsumi was silent. Hisoka was a very hard worker, and he didn't refuse to work for no reason. The secretary sighed, supposing the younger Shinigami had a point. "Alright, fine. Unpaid break until this is fixed."

"Can't we just go home?" Tsuzuki whined.

"No. It is not the end of the work day. As soon as things are fixed, you are getting back to work."

"That's not fair!"

Tatsumi ignored Tsuzuki's complaints, instead looking at his watch, and sighed. "I may have to call maintenance. Of course, the cost will also be deducted from Watari's pay."

"I don't care what you have to do," Hisoka said, shivering, "but get it fixed. I can't feel my toes."

"If you want, Kurosaki-kun, you could step outside."

Hisoka thought about that for a moment. It was either the freezing cold, or the burning heat. Either way, he would be left incredibly uncomfortable. "I think I'll stay inside. There's gotta be some way to stay fairly warm."

"I know!" Tsuzuki said, bounding over to Hisoka. "The best thing to do in situations such as these is to huddle together! You know, body warmth!"

"I am not huddling with anybody but myself." Hisoka growled, glaring at Tsuzuki and inching as far away as he could without falling off the couch.

"Come on, don't be like that! We don't want you to turn into a Sokacicle! I'll warm you up in no time!"

Without waiting for Hisoka to protest further, Tsuzuki pulled him close and wrapped his arms around his partner. Hisoka squirmed, trying to free himself from Tsuzuki's grasp.

"Tsuzuki! Let me go!"

"Just hold on, you'll warm up, trust me!"

"I don't want you to warm me up! I'll warm myself up!"

"But you obviously can't. I'm telling you, you'll feel a lot better if you let me help."

"I said no!"

Tatsumi sighed- his breath coming out in a visible puff. He didn't feel like listening to more arguing, and he had to call maintenance to turn off Watari's contraption. "I'll go call maintenance. Hopefully things will be fixed shortly."

Hisoka and Tsuzuki, however, were too busy arguing to hear Tatsumi, who simply walked out the door.

"Tsuzuki, I swear, you had better let me go right now!"

"Or what? You'll whack me?"

Hisoka growled, realizing there wasn't much he could actually do that would be a threat to Tsuzuki. He tried pulling away from Tsuzuki again, but the older man had him in a firm grip. "I swear I'll get you back for this one way or another."

"You mean reward me when you realize I was right? Why, thank you!"

Twisting himself around slightly, Hisoka whacked his partner's head. "You're not right!"

"You stopped shivering."

Realizing he had indeed stopped shivering, Hisoka glared, not happy with that revelation. "Because you made me angry." he mumbled. Though, now that he had stopped squirming, he realized that Tsuzuki was kind of warm. And kind of comfortable. It was almost enough to make Hisoka give in and nestle against his partner.

"Aahh! Kannuki! Don't-" Terazuma's voice suddenly rang out in the hall, followed by a loud roar.

Tsuzuki and Hisoka both turned to stare at the doorway, even though they couldn't actually see the event.

"Sounds like Wakaba knows how to keep warm too. Too bad that her partner is a raging hell hound." For a moment, he contemplated offering to keep Kannuki warm in front of Terazuma. Oh, that would really get under his skin.

"Don't cause more problems, idiot." Hisoka growled, having picked up on Tsuzuki's thoughts. He took advantage of the distraction to slip his way out of Tsuzuki's grasp and back to his spot on the couch. He regretted the action after the cold air hit his bare arms again, but wasn't about to admit that, nor was he about to crawl back into Tsuzuki's arms. Instead, he resumed his former position, curled up on the side of the couch. For some reason, the fact he found himself almost wanting to go back to Tsuzuki made him angrier than he already was. Or was that just because he was still cold and this entire day was crazy? Yeah, it had to be because he was still cold and the entire day was crazy.

The empath thought he felt a wave of disappointment from from his partner, though he couldn't be sure.

"I'm just going to get back to work." The smaller Shinigami said, suddenly feeling awkward staying in the room longer. He stood up and walked out the door, heading back to his office. About halfway there, he heard the sound of the air conditioning stop. Hisoka stood still for a moment, listening to make sure he wasn't just going crazy.

"Did the air conditioning finally turn off?" He asked as Tsuzuki approached behind him.

"Seems so."

Hisoka sighed in relief and continued on his way to the office. Sitting down in his chair, resumed his work. The temperature had come back to a tolerable level. Unfortunately, it only lasted a short while before it grew unbearably hot again. With the air conditioning still broken and the temperature outside still blazing, the building didn't take long to heat back up.

"You know what? Screw it. I'm going home!" Hisoka announced, threw down his pen, and, much to Tsuzuki's surprise, walked out the door. It was time to sit in his properly air-conditioned home, relax, and read a nice, long book.


	12. Discoveries

_**Summary:** Fear of loneliness spurs Hisoka to seek Tsuzuki's company one night, leading the pair to new discoveries about themselves and each other.  
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_**Rating:** K+_

_**Genre:** Romance/Hurt/Comfort_

_**Characters:** Kurosaki Hisoka, Tsuzuki Asato  
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_**Words:** 2,281  
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_**Author's Note:** Inspired by the song "Tuesday Morning" by Michelle Branch. Listening to it one day, I just began to imagine Tsuzuki and Hisoka in a situation described by the lyrics and decided to write it out. No lyrics to the song are actually included.  
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The latest case had been a trying one. After so long, Muraki had finally shown his face again. Neither Shinigami knew he was involved until it was too late. He had summoned a demon in order to lure the pair in, waiting until the perfect opportunity to make his strike. It wasn't until Tsuzuki had been distracted that he finally made a move, assaulting Hisoka mentally before taking him physically. The man had managed to get away, leaving Hisoka alone with him until Tsuzuki had managed to catch up. Muraki had vowed to kill the empath in front of Tsuzuki, intent on breaking the elder Shinigami. Things hadn't quite gone as planned, however, and Tsuzuki had beat Muraki and forced him to retreat.

After the case, the partners had decided to take a walk as a way to relax and unwind. They had wandered through a park, with no real destination in mind. At first, Tsuzuki had been feeling terribly about letting Muraki get away with Hisoka. It took some effort, but, finally, Hisoka managed to convince Tsuzuki that he wasn't to blame. The mood had shifted after that, going from uncomfortable and depressing to content. There was something about just being together that lifted their spirits, especially after a dangerous mission.

It wasn't until the sun began to set that they realized it was getting late. Reluctantly, they prepared to part ways for the night. Tsuzuki had turned, ready to walk away, when Hisoka suddenly stopped him.

"Can I...can I stay with you?"

The question had caught Tsuzuki off-guard. He turned back around, looking at his partner curiously. "Huh?"

"Are you deaf?" Hisoka snapped, glancing at the older man before looking away and saying, "I...want to go back with you...if that's okay..." While he could use the excuse he didn't want Tsuzuki to be alone after what had happened, as he had a habit of beating himself up about such incidents, the truth was, Hisoka didn't want to be alone.

Tsuzuki smiled. "Of course it's okay." It was unusual, unprecedented, in fact, for Hisoka to request such a thing, and the fact that he had slightly worried Tsuzuki that something was wrong, but he was still happy that, if something was wrong, Hisoka was willing to go to him for help. After all, there was nothing Tsuzuki wanted more than to help his partner in times of need.

With that, the pair made their way back to Tsuzuki's house. Both being rather tired, they got ready for bed. Hisoka had opted to just sleep in his clothes despite being offered a large shirt to wear as pajamas. He had also opted to sleep on Tsuzuki's couch. They said their goodnights, and shortly after, both were fast asleep.

Pleasant rest was interrupted, however, halfway through the night, when plaguing thoughts manifested themselves as nightmares.

_Hisoka found himself back in Muraki's lab. His curse marks were flaring, the pain almost unbearable. As he looked up, he saw the man responsible, grinning wickedly. In the demented doctor's arms was his partner. Though he was looking right at Hisoka, it was as if he wasn't actually seeing anything. Just as he took a step forward to save Tsuzuki, fire erupted before him. In a flash, the entire building was on fire, Muraki and Tsuzuki in the middle of it. He yelled for his friend, hoping to get him to wake up, but Tsuzuki didn't stir. As he was about to walk through the fire to get to them, he suddenly felt cold hands around his neck. Muraki had somehow gotten behind him. The doctor's grip tightened, constricting Hisoka's airway as he let out a disturbing laugh._

Hisoka shot up, sweating and breathing heavily. Another nightmare. As he tried to calm himself down, he glanced over at the door to Tsuzuki's room. It was half-closed and he couldn't see in it. Getting off of the couch, he made his way to the room, quietly pushing the door open a little more and taking a step inside. He wasn't sure why he wanted to suddenly see Tsuzuki so badly, but the urge was too strong to ignore.

Tsuzuki moaned in his sleep, distressed. Reaching out with his empathy, Hisoka sensed he too was having a nightmare. Perhaps he had sensed Tsuzuki's distress in his sleep, thus affecting his dreams. He took another quiet step forward when Tsuzuki awoke with a start. At first, Tsuzuki didn't notice the smaller man standing in the doorway. After taking a moment to gather himself, he spotted his partner.

"Hisoka?"

The younger Shinigami turned away, glad for the darkness in the room, as it prevented Tsuzuki from seeing the blush he knew was creeping across his cheeks. "S-sorry. I was...um...worried..."

Tsuzuki smiled, a reaction Hisoka supposed he should have expected. "It's okay, no need to apologize." A moment of silence passed before Tsuzuki asked, "Are you alright?"

Hisoka looked back over at his partner, wondering how he always seemed to notice when something was wrong. "I could ask you the same thing. I...sensed you were having a nightmare..."

"Oh. I'm alright now. But what about you?"

"I'm fine."

There was another moment of silence before Hisoka walked across the room, sitting down on the edge of Tsuzuki's bed. The fear of being alone was becoming unbearable, and being near Tsuzuki made him feel so much better.

"Are you sure you're alright Hisoka?" Tsuzuki asked, worried due to Hisoka's action.

There was a heavy sigh from the younger Shinigami. There wasn't really anything wrong with him. He'd had nightmares so many times, he was used to them. It wasn't as if he'd come to Tsuzuki because he was scared of a dream. He wasn't entirely sure why he was still in the older man's room, or sitting on his bed. Tsuzuki was fine, there was nothing to worry about, so why hadn't he just gone back to the couch to go back to sleep? Why was he suddenly so afraid of being alone when Tsuzuki was only a room over? Was it because the threat of losing him had become so real in the past, and seeing Muraki again had only reminded him just how close he came to losing the only person who had ever cared so much for him?

"I'm alright, really. I just...I don't know. Never mind. I'll go back to bed." Hisoka's movement to stand up was stopped when Tsuzuki suddenly took hold of his arm.

"Hold on. Umm...you can...stay in my room, if you'd like."

The empath turned to face his partner, trying to read his thoughts. They seemed slightly muddled, similar to his own, but there was a clear sense of warmth in them.

"I'd like it if you stayed. It might sound weird, but...I just want to be able to see you." The purple-eyed man glanced down and released his grip on Hisoka, figuring his partner wouldn't want to stay. After all, Hisoka was never one for sleeping near another person unless it was in a hotel room for a case with no other option. "Sorry...you can go back."

Hisoka blushed as he considered Tsuzuki's offer. He felt awkward, yet, he wanted to stay. He still didn't understand why he had such a strong desire to be near his partner, but he decided to act on it. "Let me get my pillow."

Surprised, Tsuzuki watched as the younger man walked out of the room, only to return holding the pillow he was borrowing. He looked around, as if unsure where to put it. Tsuzuki scooted over, leaving more room on his bed, patting the area next to him and giving a small, hopeful smile.

Blushing once again, Hisoka placed his pillow at the head of Tsuzuki's bed, and crawled in beside him. Tsuzuki's smile grew as he settled down. He enjoyed having his younger partner near, and he knew willingly laying next to him took a lot of trust on Hisoka's part.

"So what's on your mind? I know something is bothering you."

Hisoka thought for a moment, unsure of how to word what he wanted to say without upsetting Tsuzuki. He was afraid of losing Tsuzuki, but he wasn't about to mention his frequent nightmares about it, nor did he want Tsuzuki to start thinking about Kyoto again and get depressed. "I'm...worried about what might happen now that Muraki's back, I guess."

Tsuzuki frowned. "I know what you mean. I don't want him to hurt you..."

"Is that what your nightmare was about?"

"How could you tell?" He gave a sheepish grin, though it couldn't quite be seen in the dark, it could be heard in his voice.

"I sensed it...it was causing you so much distress, I could feel it even in my sleep. I was having a nightmare..." Hisoka was silent for a brief moment, hesitating, but decided to continue. "It started like they all have been lately. Muraki has you trapped, and I can't get there in time to help you. This time, it changed. Muraki had let you go and come to me instead. When I woke up, I realized you were having a nightmare too. I figured...what you were dreaming about was what affected mine to change."

There was another few seconds of silence as Tsuzuki thought about what he had been told. Not only had his dream affected Hisoka, but his partner was actually scared of losing him as well? "Yeah...that's what it was about. Muraki had you, and I couldn't do anything to help. I could only watch..." He trailed off before he spoke up again, "Hisoka...you're very important to me. At this point, I honestly don't know what I'd do without you. You saved me, from Muraki, from myself..."

"Tsuzuki..."

"I don't want you to go, Hisoka. I couldn't take it if you did. It would only be a matter of time before I lost myself again."

"Idiot. I'm not leaving. I told you already..." Hisoka scooted closer to Tsuzuki and wrapped his arms around him, burying his face in his older partner's chest. "I need you."

The hug surprised Tsuzuki, but he didn't hesitate to return it. As much as he cared for Hisoka, loved him, he hadn't expected Hisoka to feel the same. Hisoka, despite his usual dislike of physical contact, didn't want to move. He was beginning to realize the bond he shared with Tsuzuki was something much deeper than he'd previously thought.

For a long while, the two simply laid like that, silently embracing one another. Finally, Tsuzuki spoke, "We should try to go back to sleep. I'm sure you're tired."

Hisoka gave a low grunt in agreement and withdrew his arms, but did not move farther from Tsuzuki. The elder Shinigami kept one arm wrapped around his partner, moving the other to softly stroke Hisoka's hair. "Go back to sleep."

The empath could feel the caring and love emanating from Tsuzuki, further enhanced by the gentle fingers running through his hair and the arm holding him close. It made him feel safe and...wanted. Perhaps this was part of what he had been seeking. Tsuzuki was so gentle and loving, and now Hisoka was beginning to figure out just how Tsuzuki felt about him, and how he felt about Tsuzuki.

The older man watched his partner fall asleep, not closing his eyes and continuing to soothe Hisoka until he was sure that he was sleeping comfortably. Even after his breathing slowed, Tsuzuki continued to watch him, running his fingers across Hisoka's cheeks and brushing his bangs back. He'd never expected this to happen. While he'd wished it, he never believed it would be anything more than a wish. After all, why would somebody like Hisoka want to be so close to somebody like him? It didn't seem possible, yet, Hisoka had managed to make Tsuzuki finally feel like he was actually worth something. He was actually needed by someone.

Despite his fatigue, Tsuzuki didn't want to sleep. This was too precious a moment to miss. But, perhaps, it wouldn't be the last. If Hisoka really did care for him as much as it now seemed, this was only the start of many treasured moments between them.

The need for sleep eventually overcame the Shinigami. Just before dropping into unconsciousness, he moved his arm down to loosely wrap around his partner's waist, letting him fall asleep with the knowledge that Hisoka was there, and wasn't going to leave.

-xxxxxxxxxxxxxx-

Green eyes fluttered open to sunlight filling the room. For the first time since they had gone to bed the previous night, Hisoka could fully see Tsuzuki lying right beside him. The older man looked so peaceful and content. There were no fake smiles trying to hide pain. Even in sleep, the empath could feel the genuine happiness his partner was feeling. He was still in Tsuzuki's arms, and made no move to change that.

Watching his partner sleep, Hisoka reflected upon what had happened the previous night. Not only had he discovered the deeper meaning behind his bond with Tsuzuki, but he had communicated this understanding as well, both through his actions and words. Tsuzuki, too, had confessed that he felt something much more than a simple friendship toward him. They had discovered more about themselves and each other in that one moment than Hisoka thought possible. There was only more for them to discover from here.

The door had been opened, and they had begun to walk through, hand-in-hand.


	13. Blackout

_**Summary:** Dinner at Hisoka's house takes a slight turn when a blackout plunges the house in darkness, but the lack of light may not be so bad after all...  
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_**Rating:** K+_

_**Genre:** Romance/Humor_

_**Characters:** Kurosaki Hisoka, Tsuzuki Asato  
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_**Words:** 2,793  
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_**Author's Note:** This was a request from one of my reviewers, general zargon. Thank you so much! It made me happy to know somebody likes my writing enough to actually request something! ^^ This one is a little more heavy on romance than I've done previously, something I've actually wanted to try with this couple. I enjoyed writing this, and I hope you, along with the rest of my readers, enjoy it as well. Thanks as always to my readers and reviewers. 3  
_

* * *

"Please?"

"No. We don't have the money to eat out right now."

"Pretty please?"

"I said no."

"Hiisookaaaaa..."

"For the last time, no! Now stop whining!"

"Then can I at least go to your house?"

There was an annoyed sigh from Hisoka as he looked at Tsuzuki's pleading expression. Did he always have to pout like that? "Fine. But you are to stay out of my kitchen. The last time you promised to cook dinner, you forgot it was in the oven and burnt it to a crisp. Not to mention we had to air out the house from all the smoke."

"That's just because I forgot to set the alarm!"

"Either way, you still caused it and you are not cooking."

"Alright, alright. I guess it's not a big deal though, I like it when you cook."

Hisoka rolled his eyes. "Of course you do. You don't have to do anything but sit around being lazy until it's ready."

"That's not true! I just like the taste of your food! Hey, can we make dessert too?"

"There will be no 'we', but _I_ might make something if you stop whining."

Tsuzuki's pout immediately changed to an expression of joy. "Yay! Alright, let's get going!"

Without wasting another moment, Tsuzuki got on his coat and bounded for the door, Hisoka trailing behind him, shaking his head. The elder Shinigami had spontaneously decided that the pair should go out for dinner a half hour prior to getting out of work. Unfortunately for him, he was broke as usual, and Hisoka wasn't willing to spend even more money eating out before they got their next paychecks. They had already eaten out at fairly expensive restaurants twice that week- a record for Hisoka- and with how much Tsuzuki ate, it had drained away a good portion of his previous paycheck. While Tsuzuki had offered to pay for it, Hisoka knew he hadn't had the cash, thus putting him in more debt. He had to wonder if Tsuzuki even had any food in his house currently, and if that was the reason he was so adamant upon either going out or eating at Hisoka's.

"You're lucky I love you." Hisoka mumbled as the pair left the building and headed for his house.

"I know!" Tsuzuki smiled, stopping behind Hisoka to give him a hug. "I consider myself very lucky."

"Alright, alright, let go." The younger Shinigami blushed and brushed Tsuzuki's arms away. It had only been very recent that they had 'officially' become a couple, and Hisoka still felt awkward about expressing it. He was less shy around Tsuzuki, though he was adamant upon keeping their relationship private. As far as he was concerned, it wasn't anybody else's business. He was always a very private person, and it wasn't about to change. Tsuzuki had accepted this, and, for the most part, managed to keep from doing or saying anything that he didn't normally do. He was a naturally affectionate person, so random hugs were to be expected. Despite their efforts though, most everyone else seemed to somehow know anyway. They weren't quite sure how or why, but, if the others did know, they kept it to themselves. Most of the time, anyway.

Of course, once they were out of work, Tsuzuki liked to spend as much time with Hisoka as possible. They'd often go home with one another and eat dinner together. Since Tsuzuki was a danger in the kitchen, however, Hisoka was the one who did the cooking if they weren't ordering out or eating at a restaurant.

"So, what are we going to have?" The older man asked, taking his partner's hand in his as they walked.

"You'll see when I make it."

"Can't I at least get a hint?"

"Nope. You can wait."

"Fiiiiine." Tsuzuki huffed.

When they arrived at Hisoka's house, they hung up their coats. Hisoka sent Tsuzuki away to occupy himself with something else while he worked on dinner. His partner begged to help, but he wasn't ready to risk having him in the kitchen. Not until he proved he could help with something simple without making it a disaster.

This particular dinner wasn't exactly complicated, but he was sure Tsuzuki would sneak in an ingredient or two that would totally ruin it. He had planned on making a nice stew, and had actually cooked it most of the day the previous day since a proper stew needed enough time. All he had to do was heat it up again. After pulling the container from his fridge, he put the stew into a big pot on the stove, turned the fire on and covered it. Now, to just let it heat up.

Just as he turned to leave the kitchen for the living room where he had left his partner to watch T.V., the lights suddenly went out, plunging the house into darkness. The sounds of the television also stopped, leaving Hisoka to believe they were suffering a blackout.

"Aah! What happened?" Tsuzuki yelled from the other room.

"A blackout...something must have happened outside." He frowned, unused to being in such deep darkness. There was always a light of some sort on in his house, as he hated the dark. Luckily, he always had a working flashlight stored in the front of one of his cupboards, just in case something like this ever happened.

Tsuzuki got up from the couch, hoping to find his way to Hisoka without being able to see. No sooner had he gotten up than he banged his leg on the coffee table.

"What did you do?" Hisoka called out after hearing Tsuzuki's yelp.

"Banged my leg...ow..."

The younger Shinigami sighed. "Of course. Hold on, I should have a flashlight and some candles somewhere. I just gotta find them..." He slowly began making his way towards his cupboards, hoping to find his flashlight so he could then locate some candles.

"Where do you keep them?"

"In the cupboards in the kitchen. I'm looking for the flashlight now."

Tsuzuki had soon managed to find the kitchen without further injuring himself. "I'll help."

"Just be careful, I don't need you knocking everything down."

"I'll be careful, don't worry!" He walked across the kitchen to where he had heard Hisoka's voice, feeling around the darkness to avoid bumping into anything. One of his hands landed on something soft right in front of him. "What's this?" He asked, wondering what in the kitchen could be soft.

"Ts-Tsuzuki!" Hisoka suddenly yelled before slapping his hand away. "Watch where you put your hands!"

"Oh, was that you?"

"Yes, that was me!"

"Oops. Did I grab your butt?" When Hisoka didn't respond, Tsuzuki asked again, "Well?"

"Yes..." Came the mumbled reply. He was glad that it was too dark for Tsuzuki to tell his face had turned red as a cherry.

"Sorry." Though he was apologizing, the empath could both sense and hear the amused tone in his voice.

If it was possible for his face to get any more red than it already had been, Hisoka was sure it had happened. "Don't sound so happy about it, you perv!"

"Not my fault it was in front of me. Stop trying to sound so upset about it. You know it wasn't that bad." Tsuzuki teased.

"Idiot!"

Even in the dark, Hisoka seemed to be able to find Tsuzuki's head to deliver a whack, which was quickly followed up by a second one when he heard the thought, 'it was worth it'. "I can hear you, you know!"

"Aren't you supposed to be looking for a flashlight?"

"I could if you would stop putting your hands where they don't belong."

"Hey, it was an accident, and I only did it once."

Hisoka turned back around and tried finding the right cupboard. Since he knew the layout of his house well enough and knew what cupboard it was located in, he found the handle quick enough. With some groping around, his hand finally landed on the flashlight. "There." He said, pulling it out and turning it on. Shining the light into the cupboard, he found his candles and matches. "Can you help me light these?"

While Hisoka held the flashlight, Tsuzuki pulled out the candles and matches, lit one, then used the lit candle to light the other ones. "How's that?"

"Good." He glanced over at the stove. Since it ran on gas, he could still cook dinner. Good thing he decided to make stew tonight. "Well, now we just have to wait for dinner. That will still cook, at least."

"Oh, good. I'd hate to miss dinner!"

Hisoka shook his head. Count on Tsuzuki to worry about food.

"You know..." Tsuzuki said as he placed two of the lit candles onto the table, "The power going out might not be so bad. Dinners by candlelight can be quite romantic."

The younger man felt his cheeks turn pink again. "What do you want to do while we wait? The food still has to heat up."

"Why don't we go back to the parlor for now? I don't mind just sitting on the couch while we wait."

Hisoka gave a nod, though he wasn't sure if Tsuzuki could see it or not, grabbed the two other candles, and walked to the parlor, the other following. He sat down and placed the candles on the coffee table. Once they were both settled, Tsuzuki wrapped his arms around his partner, pulling him close. Hisoka rested his head against his shoulder, relaxing.

"Comfortable?"

"Mm." Hisoka had become more accustomed to cuddling. It was something that was almost unavoidable with Tsuzuki, as the older man loved it, and it was becoming something Hisoka loved as well. While physical affections, or any physical contact in general had long been awkward for him, he had gradually gotten used to them from Tsuzuki, and had come to find it was rather enjoyable. Tsuzuki was always so comfortable, and the physical contact allowed him to better feel the loving emotions his partner felt for him.

"I really am lucky."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm lucky to have you."

Hisoka reached up to lightly hit Tsuzuki's head before resuming his former position. "Idiot. It's not luck. I love you because of you, not because of luck. Besides, It's what you wanted, isn't it? You deserve to be happy... I'm just glad that I'm the one who can do that for you..."

"Hisoka..." Tsuzuki smiled and hugged his partner tighter. "You really do make me happy. Happier than I've ever been. But...what about you?"

"Stop being stupid. Of course I am. You're...the first person who ever cared so much for me. You taught me how to be compassionate, how to trust people again..." He buried his face in Tsuzuki's shoulder, clinging to him tightly. "You've done so much for me..."

Gentle fingers brushed through Hisoka's hair. "I'm glad."

There was a moment of silence before Hisoka sat up. "I'd better go check on the stew."

Reluctantly, Tsuzuki let him go, but followed him to the kitchen.

After finding the ladle, Hisoka dipped it into the pot, scooping up a small amount of stew. Once it had stopped dripping, he turned around, holding it out to Tsuzuki. "Tell me how it is. It should be done. Be careful, because it's hot."

Tsuzuki happily obliged, somewhat cautiously sipping the stew from the ladle. "Mm, that's delicious! I'd say it's ready to eat!"

"Alright, get two bowls and I'll serve it."

Once the table was set and the food was served, the pair began eating their dinner. The electricity still hadn't come back on, but there was enough light from the candles for them to enjoy their meal. Hisoka was happy with how the stew came out, and Tsuzuki was devouring it.

"Why don't you take a moment to actually taste it before you swallow it?"

"Don't worry, I can taste it, and it's wonderful! You make the best stews!"

Hisoka smiled and shook his head as his partner inhaled another spoonful of stew. It didn't take long before the older man's bowl was empty and licked clean. Since Hisoka was still eating, he simply continued to sit and wait.

He watched as the light from the flames danced across Hisoka's features. Even in such dim light, it was easy to see how attractive the younger man was. It was something Tsuzuki hadn't considered quite to this degree before. While it wasn't strange for him to have considered Hisoka good-looking, he hadn't actually been physically attracted to him at first. After all, Hisoka was still a child when they first met, whether he liked being considered so or not. Though his body couldn't age, he had matured in other ways since then, and Tsuzuki had come to see him differently as a result. Hisoka wasn't a child anymore. He was an amazing young man who Tsuzuki was growing to love more every day.

"What are you doing?" Hisoka asked, catching Tsuzuki staring at him.

Tsuzuki smiled. "Admiring you." This time, Hisoka's blush was seen. Tsuzuki laughed. "You're so cute."

Hisoka chose not to respond, instead finishing up his food. Once he was done, he gathered his and Tsuzuki's dishes, rinsed them out, then left them in the sink.

"Sorry, Tsuzuki, but I won't be able to make dessert with the power out."

"That's okay." Tsuzuki said, coming up from behind Hisoka and wrapping his arms around the younger's waist. "I can go without dessert. I have you."

As the empath turned his head to look at his partner, Tsuzuki brought their lips together. The sudden kiss surprised him, leaving him to stand there for a moment as if unsure how to act. There had only been one other time when Tsuzuki had kissed him on the lips- he didn't want to overdo it and wanted to make sure he eased Hisoka into the relationship. The first one had been with permission and had been a quick, chaste kiss. This time, it had been completely unexpected, and Tsuzuki was lingering longer.

He was interrupted, however, when the power suddenly came back on, filling the room with light. Tsuzuki pulled back with a frown. "I was enjoying the candlelight."

Hisoka moved away from Tsuzuki, and, for a moment, the older man thought he had upset him. The thought was dashed as Hisoka flicked off the light and walked back into Tsuzuki's arms. "Better?"

"Yes." Tsuzuki smiled and brought their lips back together, arms wrapped tightly around Hisoka's waist. The empath closed his eyes, allowing himself to be lost in the moment. Bringing his arms up to wrap around Tsuzuki's neck, he returned the kiss. He could feel Tsuzuki's love for him enveloping him like a thick, warm blanket, the strong arms around him keeping him safe and secure. It was such an intense feeling that he'd never experienced before, a level of happiness from both sides that neither had come to think was even possible. There was a blissful sigh from Tsuzuki as he held Hisoka closer to him.

After a few more seconds, Tsuzuki broke the kiss, not wanting to overwhelm his empathetic partner. He didn't pull away, however, keeping his arms firmly around him and resting his forehead against Hisoka's. There was a smile stretched across Tsuzuki's face that Hisoka couldn't help but mirror. A thumb softly stroked the younger man's cheek.

"You mean everything to me, Hisoka. I love you so much..."

"Tsuzuki..."

"You don't have to keep using my last name, you know. At least when we're alone...it's too impersonal."

"Then...Asato, I love you too..."

Tsuzuki gently lifted Hisoka's chin to give him another quick kiss before finally pulling away.

"It's starting to get late...I'm sure you want some time to yourself before you go to bed. Should I get going?"

Hisoka shook his head and wrapped his arms around Tsuzuki's waist. He had finally discovered what it was like to be loved, and to love in return. He didn't want to end this moment, not so soon. "Stay with me. Please...I don't want you to go."

Tsuzuki smiled. There was nothing more he wanted than to be asked to stay. "Then I'm all yours."


	14. When Google Gives You Mpreg

_**Summary:** Watari gets what he believes to be a very clever idea from the stories that horrified Tsuzuki, Hisoka and Tatsumi.  
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_**Rating:** T  
_

_**Genre:** Parody/Humor_

_**Characters:** Watari Yutaka  
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_**Words:** 3,666  
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_**Author's Note:** A sequel to When Google Gives You Lemons. As before, this is not intended to make fun of anybody or anybody's fanfictions. It is simply to entertain the idea of Watari being inspired by fanfiction for one of his newest crazy experiments. Thanks to EggDropSoup for reading over it for me first, as I was unsure whether or not to post it. :3 And, of course, thanks to my reviewers!  
_

* * *

The idea was crazy. Pulling such a thing off would be nearly impossible. But, Watari was considered by some to be crazy, and there was nothing he loved more than a good challenge.

The self-proclaimed scientist was currently sitting in front of one of his computer screens, staring at the page of stories on his web browser. He had heard from Tsuzuki that stories were being written about them, many involving romantic and/or sexual relations between at least two characters, and, of course he had to check them out. Simply out of curiosity, of course. While doing so, he had come upon an interesting term: M-preg. Upon further research, he discovered it was short for male pregnancy, something that was completely impossible due to biology. If there was one thing that woman could do and men couldn't, it was to birth a baby. This fact didn't seem to prevent the idea from being written about, however. It was clearly something many people thought about, based on the stories he was finding. As much as finding this website of stories to begin with horrified Tsuzuki, Tatsumi and Hisoka, Watari found it intriguing. What if men _could_ give birth? It would require immense amounts of nearly impossible science, but, perhaps, it could be made possible. After all, Watari was working on his sex-change potion, and this idea wasn't so far off. In fact, such research could even help him in his ultimate goal of completely changing the male body to a female body. It would be a sort of half-change, with the subject obtaining only the parts necessary for carrying a baby. Of course, without a full-gender change, a C-section would be required, but that was not a problem. Then, he would be one step closer to a full-gender change! Not to mention the huge leap in science it would be. It was brilliant!

The biggest problem, of course, would not be creating the potion that would cause the change, but actually putting it to use. It would be difficult enough finding a willing participant, but Shinigami's bodies didn't change. Even female Shinigami could not have babies. The mother's body simply wouldn't change to accommodate the child. Whether or not the child itself would be able to grow was unknown. Watari assumed it would be part of a Shinigami's genetics to have a body that never ages that would then be passed on to the child, thus making it impossible to grow, but there was no proof of such a thing. Still, he would have to look into it. He couldn't do such a test on a living human, only a fellow Shinigami would be allowed without facing horrendous consequences. So, not only did Watari have to make it possible for a male to bear a child, but for a Shinigami's body be able to change to accommodate the child, and for the child to be able to grow. This was going to be the most difficult task Watari ever had to- and probably ever would- face, which, in his mind, made it all the more appealing.

-xxxxxxxxxx-

"Yes! I've got it!" Watari exclaimed before emitting a laugh a bit too similar to that of a maniac. It had been months since the idea first came to him, and he had been working diligently on it ever since, but he was convinced he had finally concocted a formula that would allow men to bear babies. His excessive research and experimentation had, luckily, gone unnoticed by Tatsumi, who had been too busy trying to track down and sue those who had posted stories to the website (though the secretary's efforts had so far been in vain, which was making him increasingly annoyed and borderline crazy). Now, he just had to test it, and he had an idea of who he could go to...

"Hey, Tsuzuki! Hey, bon!"

"Will you _stop_ calling me that? I'm not a kid!" Hisoka growled, glaring at the enthusiastic blond Shinigami standing in the doorway to his and Tsuzuki's office.

"You're right, you aren't a kid anymore, just a force of habit, since you are still the youngest among us."

"What do you want, Watari?" The empath asked in an unpleasant tone.

"How do you feel about children? You like them, right? At least, I know Tsuzuki does."

Tsuzuki looked at Watari curiously. "I love children, but why do you ask?"

"Well, Tsuzuki, I have a proposition for you. It'll sound crazy, but I can make it totally possible! How would you like to get Hisoka pregnant?"

There was a combination of sputtering as Hisoka spit out his tea and Tsuzuki choked on his pastry.

"Get Hisoka _what_?"

"Pregnant! You know, have a kid! You said you always wanted to have a kid!"

"I'm not a woman!" Hisoka yelled. "And just what are you implying?"

"I know you aren't a woman, that's the whole point!"

"Why me?"

Watari shrugged. "You two are really the only couple it'd work for. Tsuzuki did say he wanted a kid, but he doesn't have a proper diet to sustain a baby. You eat healthier, so you'd have the kid!" Though, thinking about it, Hisoka didn't have the best overall health, and he was awfully skinny. Maybe Tsuzuki should be the one to carry it instead? "Well, I guess we could reverse it and Tsuzuki could be the one to get pregnant instead. Doesn't matter too much to me either way."

Hisoka was getting increasingly flustered the more Watari talked. "What do you mean we're the 'only couple'? Stop acting like we're...we're married or something!"

"Oh, come on. Don't pretend like you two aren't together, it's obvious! Anyway, yeah, I need you guys to try this out for me."

"I amNOT going to let you give me some weird experiment to make me...make me..._pregnant_!" Hisoka spit out the last word as if it was some horrible curse- which, in Hisoka's opinion, it would be. Not only was it completely unnatural for a man to have a baby, but the thought of having a growing being inside of him and leeching off of him was rather unappealing. "That's not even possible, I don't care what you think you can do."

Watari huffed. "I'm aware it isn't possible...naturally, hence my experiment! Think about it! You can have your own nice little family!"

"So experiment on yourself." Hisoka growled. It was taking all he had not to strangle Watari.

"But I can't! I don't have a partner! It's designed to occur as naturally as possible, so it won't work with just one person. Besides, an offspring requires two sets of DNA. Like I said, you two are the only pair that it'd work for. Terazuma is with Kannuki, and Tatsumi doesn't have a partner either. Even if he did, I wouldn't ask him, because any and all expenses for the baby he'd drain straight out of my paycheck."

"Where did you even get this idea?"

"That website with those stories about us!"

Tsuzuki and Hisoka both wore a similar look of horror on their faces.

"There are stories about us getting pregnant?" Tsuzuki said, terrified that the stories were worse than he had originally realized.

"Yep! Most of them are about you two, actually. Not that that's why I chose you- it's just because you're the best candidates."

Hisoka fought to keep his voice at a normal level. "Watari, you have 5 seconds to get out before I start experimenting on ways to kill a Shinigami."

With a sigh, the scientist held up his hands in defeat. "Alright, fine, I'll leave you alone for now. But, think about it, Tsuzuki! Yipe!" He barely had time to move out of the way as a paperholder flew at his head. He retreated quickly, narrowly avoiding further assaults from Hisoka.

"Ridiculous." Hisoka muttered to himself as he sat back down to resume his paperwork. Out of all the absurd things for Watari to come up with, he wanted to try male pregnancy, and had the nerve to ask him to be the guinea pig? And, as if that wasn't bad enough, the implications Watari was making about him and Tsuzuki were too much. Watari had specifically said 'get Hisoka pregnant', not to mention he said it was designed to occur as naturally as possible, meaning it was expected that he and Tsuzuki would...

"I am going to kill him!" Hisoka yelled aloud to no one, appalled that Watari would insinuate such a thing. That sort of thing would _not_ happen, and it was none of Watari's business to talk about it. Even if it did happen- which it wouldn't- he wouldn't have anybody else knowing about it. After all, that was a highly private matter, not something that should be talked about so freely. Whatever happened between him and Tsuzuki _stayed_ between him and Tsuzuki, and their relationship would most certainly not be taken advantage of for Watari's "science".

"Are you okay, Hisoka? Your face is redder than a cherry."

"I'll be fine once I can get my hands around Watari's neck." Hisoka grumbled.

"Don't worry, I'm pretty sure what Watari wants to do is impossible. At least, I think it is..."

Back in his lab, Watari mulled over his experiment. While he had expected Hisoka's reaction, he had hoped Tsuzuki at least would have been a little more excited. How was he going to get this to work if he had nobody to test it on? There were plenty of guys in the living world who'd want such a potion, he was sure, but he certainly couldn't try it on humans that were still living. Tsuzuki and Hisoka were the only two that could test it out. The problem was actually getting them to do so, and Hisoka would be impossible to convince.

But maybe...maybe he didn't have to convince Hisoka. He could just slip the potion into youngest Shinigami's tea every so often and wait for results. After all, it was only a matter of time before those two finally took their relationship seriously, no matter what they said. Watari found it painfully obvious that they wanted each other, the kid was just too stubborn to admit it. Maybe they just needed a little nudge in the right direction. Oh, yes, that was exactly what they needed. If it took too long, he could concoct a love potion to sneak to Hisoka too. Of course, the short-tempered Shinigami would be quite angry at first, but Watari was sure he'd thank him later. Or at least stop trying to kill him eventually.

A smug grin crossed Watari's face. He was so brilliant, he scared himself sometimes. Time to plan and work his magic.

-xxxxxxxx-

"So, Tsuzuki, how are things between you and bo-...I mean, Hisoka?" Watari asked the following day after work. Hisoka had already gone home, and Watari had pulled Tsuzuki aside before he left too.

"Fine. Why do you ask?"

"Just fine? Not excellent, not good, just fine?"

Tsuzuki raised an eyebrow. "It's pretty much the same as always. Is that bad?"

Watari sighed. "Tsuzuki, Tsuzuki...I expected more out of you by now!"

"What are you talking about?"

"You and Hisoka! Come on, I know you, you wanna get with your partner."

Tsuzuki's cheeks turned pink and he rubbed the back of his neck. "That obvious?"

"Are you kidding? The both of you! Want it but won't do anything about it. I'm surprised you haven't flung yourself at him already!"

"I don't know. I mean, I don't think Hisoka's ready for-"

"Oh, please. He's gotta get over it. He wants you, Tsuzuki."

"You think?"

Watari grinned. "Trust me."

It was another week before Watari noticed anything different between the pair. They were small things, but Hisoka seemed less shy than usual. The two seemed a little more open with each other, and didn't seem to mind it being obvious they were leaving work together. Watari had even caught them holding hands a couple of times. The sight almost made him giddy with excitement. Not because he had seen proof that they were finally together, but because it meant he was one step closer to realizing his experiment. It would just be silly if their relationship status alone made him so happy- and borderline creepy. Spying on them in the first place was borderline creepy, but he was doing it in the name of science, so it was alright.

The next day marked the first of several days that Watari would sneak his potion into Hisoka's drinks. He hated wasting potion, but he didn't know how long it lasted, and he had no clue when Tsuzuki and Hisoka would dance the tango, so to speak, and thus allow him to make a huge advancement in science. Unfortunately, it didn't seem like it was going to be happening anytime soon. He really wished Tsuzuki would just throw himself at Hisoka already. Maybe he needed to push them along a bit. Though, thinking about it, it was kind of cruel- and creepy- to want to force them into such a thing. After all, they needed to go at their own pace. Too bad their pace was so very slow. At least, to Watari, who was waiting to see the fruits of his labor, it was slow.

Then he reminded himself that it was for science, and that the pair would most certainly thank him for it in the end, and it was alright again.

Then, a couple of days later, the two were sent on a case. Watari had made sure to put extra potion in one of Hisoka's drinks before he left. Luckily, he had made it nearly tasteless, so Hisoka had drank it anyway. He just hoped it would last until they came back.

Two days after that, they had finished their case, and Tsuzuki called Hisoka out sick.

"How's Hisoka?" Watari asked shortly after Tsuzuki arrived at work. "Heard you called him out of work."

"Yeah, he wasn't feeling well this morning. He was being stubborn about it though, and said he was going to go to work anyway. I had to call Tatsumi myself and convince him to stay home."

"How did you know he was sick?"

"Uh...well, he stayed at my place last night after we got in from the case."

Watari raised an eyebrow, a small smirk forming on his lips. He was liking where this was going. "Was he fine last night?"

"He seemed to be."

"What's wrong with him?"

Tsuzuki shrugged. "He said he didn't feel good as soon as he woke up. He actually ended up vomiting, that's when I told him to stay home. It took me a while to convince him, though. He was being unusually moody. I mean, I know he gets like that sometimes, but not that bad. He was snapping at me for everything."

"Really?" Watari could hardly contain his excitement. His potion must be working faster than he thought it would! Perhaps the pregnancy process would actually be faster in a Shinigami. "You should bring him in to see me after work."

"Yeah, that's a good idea. I'm not sure what he came down with, but it's making him miserable. Whatever it is hit quickly and hard."

"By the way, how was it?"

"How was what?" Tsuzuki asked, clearly confused.

"Oh, come on. Don't tell me you haven't slept together?"

The elder Shinigami stared at Watari for a moment in surprise before rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "O-oh, um...well..."

"You don't gotta hide it. Come on, I'm your best friend! You can tell me anything!"

"It's just, Hisoka doesn't want anybody else to know. He likes to keep things private, you know?"

Watari laughed. "I get it, I get it. Then you have! Soooo? How was it?"

Tsuzuki looked slightly confused again, as if wondering why he'd ask a question like that. "Uh...good? How else would it be?"

"Oh, Tsuzuki...it's okay, I get it, you don't wanna give details. I'll stop pestering you. See you later!" With a wink, he headed off to work, trying to contain his giddiness. He knew it'd work with those two eventually! A checkup after work would certainly confirm Hisoka's pregnancy. Yes siree! Until then, he just had to focus on getting the rest of his work done before Tatsumi got on his case.

-xxxxxxxxx-

Halfway through the day, Hisoka showed up to work. Since he felt better, he didn't see a reason to stay home and preferred to come in to at least get some work done. He was still snappy, however, leading to a lot of pouting from Tsuzuki for the rest of the afternoon. By the time work was over, Hisoka was ready to storm out of the place and leave Tsuzuki behind.

"Whoa, bon, not so fast!" Watari said, grabbing hold of his arm before he could get far. "I owe you a checkup!"

"I'm fine, let me go!" Hisoka tried pulling his arm away, but Watari's grip was firm.

"Nope. Not until you get that checkup. It's not normal for Shinigami to vomit."

Despite much protesting, the overly-happy scientist managed to drag Hisoka to his lab, Tsuzuki tagging behind. "It won't take long, don't worry! Now, just lay down on that table right there."

When Hisoka didn't move, Tsuzuki spoke up. "Please, Hisoka? Just let him make sure there's nothing wrong. We don't want you to get really sick if we can find out what it is and fix it before it gets worse!"

"Fine, if I agree, will you stop pestering me?"

"Yes."

With an aggravated sigh, Hisoka plopped down on the table and laid down. "Make it quick."

Humming to himself, Watari pulled up Hisoka's shirt, which the younger immediately pushed back down.

"What are you doing?"

"Giving you a checkup! Now keep your shirt up." After pulling Hisoka's shirt back up, the scientist grabbed a bottle full of a clear gel and squeezed some of its contents out onto Hisoka's skin. At this point, Hisoka pushed his hand away and sat up, knowing there was something wrong with this supposed checkup.

"Alright, what is that for? A checkup doesn't require gel!"

It was impossible for Watari not to grin. "Checking to see if you're pregnant!"

"WHAT? Why the hell would I be pregnant?"

Watari laughed nervously. "Well, you see...I had to test out my potion, and, like I said before, you two are the best candidates."

"You...snuck your potions to me?" Hisoka was enraged at this revelation. "And what makes you think it would have even worked?"

"Tsuzuki DID tell me you two slept together."

At this news, Hisoka's face turned bright red as he turned on Tsuzuki. "Wh-what?"

"Sorry! He kept asking!"

"Why would you-...we-...TSUZUKI!"

Tsuzuki looked like a puppy being cornered by a bear. "I'm sorry! I didn't think it was a big deal! I thought it would be okay if he knew we cuddled! He already knew we've been together."

Watari stopped. That didn't sound right. "...Cuddled? I didn't ask if you cuddled, I asked if you slept with him!"

"I know, and I answered!"

"That's not the same thing!"

"But doesn't sleeping in the same bed with somebody constitute sleeping together? We were together, and we were sleeping. We just happened to cuddle too."

Watari slapped his own forehead. He knew Tsuzuki could be dense sometimes, but not _that_ dense! "That's not what I meant!"

"Then what did you mean?"

"Come on, Tsuzuki! You know, got intimate? Made love?"

"Oh...wait, no!"

"Why would you ask that?" Hisoka yelled, red in the face both from embarrassment and from anger. "That's not even any of your business!"

"But...you had morning sickness! That means my potion must have worked, so you guys must've done it!"

"For the last time, Watari, I'm not pregnant! I'm a male! It's. Not. Possible!"

"How can you be sure?"

If looks could kill, Watari would have been dead in an instant. "Not. Possible."

"Can't I at least check to make sure?"

"Fine! Fine, Watari, check and realize you are wrong!" With a huff, Hisoka laid back down, allowing Watari to continue with his checkup just to shut him up and make him realize he was wrong, hopefully embarrassing him in the process. Sure enough, there was absolutely no indication of pregnancy. This discovery brought down Watari's mood quite a bit.

"Well, that's odd...you had the symptoms of morning sickness..."

"Did you ever think that maybe all your stupid potion did was make me ill?"

"Hmm...that's quite a possibility, bon. Guess it's back to the drawing board."

"That's it, I'm leaving!" Not giving Watari the opportunity to say or do anything else, Hisoka stormed out of the lab.

"Ah, Hisoka, wait!" Tsuzuki called after him before following.

The scientist gave a sigh. He had been so close! Though, if what the two had said was true and they really didn't get that far in their relationship yet, perhaps that was the reason for his failure. The potion could very well have been correct, but it wouldn't have worked without the baby-making process.

Yes, he couldn't give up now! There was still hope! He just had to keep trying. Someday...someday he would make it come true! In the meantime, perhaps he could try his hand at a love potion...


	15. Simple Things

_**Summary:** Sometimes, it was the simple things that meant the most.  
_

_**Rating:** T  
_

_**Genre:** Romance_

_**Characters:** Tsuzuki Asato, Kurosaki Hisoka  
_

_**Words:** 2,253  
_

_**Author's Note:** This was written for EggDropSoup, who requested a romance. I tried to express the relationship between the two as if they had admitted their feelings for each other and been going out for a bit, hence Hisoka being more open. Writing this, I realized how I am not used to writing romance without some sort of angst. I hope it is still enjoyable!_

* * *

Hisoka Kurosaki was never one for romance. Love was a foreign emotion for him. He'd never experienced it, nor had he ever felt it in another. Brief moments of its warmth was all his empathy ever picked up on from other people on the rare occasions he was allowed out. It was only through his ability to sense the emotions of others that he was able to feel it at all. It wasn't until he died that he'd truly begun to understand it.

His partner as a shinigami, the outgoing, compassionate Asato Tsuzuki, had more love for people than Hisoka ever believed one person could hold. He not only cared about everyone, but seemed to fall in love rather easily. It had happened on one of their missions- he had gotten emotionally closer to a young woman than a shinigami ever should to a living human. Hisoka had sensed it and warned Tsuzuki early on, but the older man had denied it. It aggravated the empath that his partner would lie about it to him when he could sense it. It also aggravated him how very easily the man could fall for another person. How could he be so trusting, how could he go against the laws of being a shinigami without even thinking about it? After that, Hisoka began to learn that's just how his partner was.

His elder partner's love for just about anybody, be it a simple friendship or something more, became something he expected from the man. After all, Tsuzuki was quite a romantic. It was something that annoyed Hisoka at first, but something that, as they grew closer, he began to appreciate. His anger towards Tsuzuki's flirtatious teases dissipated when he'd finally admitted that he himself had fallen in love with the man and had finally accepted Tsuzuki's desire to be with him. Neither of them ever thought they would be together in such a way, and yet, it had happened, and neither of them took advantage of it.

It was often small things that they did for each other. Tsuzuki loved showing his affection for his partner at any and every opportunity, but it was often in small, simple ways that Hisoka appreciated. He could find romance in just about any situation, no matter how mundane or simple. Hisoka wasn't quite as used to showing affection, especially around others, but also enjoyed doing small things for Tsuzuki that showed he cared. He enjoyed surprising Tsuzuki, doing things for him when he least expected it. While Tsuzuki seemed to be doing something for Hisoka constantly, however, the empath was often still surprised by how loving his partner could be.

They were currently sitting in their office on a perfectly normal, quiet day. There was nothing special about it, nothing that should make it anything particularly meaningful. It was the same, daily routine they always followed. And yet, despite this, there was one thing that stood out, one small thing that was trying to make the day anything but the same, ordinary routine- Tsuzuki wouldn't stop staring at Hisoka.

It was fairly normal for Hisoka to catch Tsuzuki occasionally putting off his work to devote his silent attention to him, even though Hisoka himself was busy working. Today, however, it seemed Tsuzuki wouldn't give his attention to anything else for longer than a few minutes at a time. The empath kept feeling his partner's eyes on him, sensing the man's emotions. Tsuzuki wasn't even trying to hide it- in fact, he was practically broadcasting the warm emotions he felt toward his partner, his desire just to be near him. This wouldn't have bothered Hisoka if not for the fact it was beginning to distract him from his work.

"Do you mind toning it down a little bit? We're at work, so turn around and get yours done." It amazed the empath at how something so small, such as Tsuzuki watching him, could be so very distracting. It had a more powerful impact on him than he would have liked.

"But you're so much more interesting than paperwork."

Hisoka felt his cheeks turn red- something that, despite being more open about his relationship to Tsuzuki, still happened on a regular basis, much to his dismay. "Interesting or not, you still have to get it done."

"Wanna go out after work?" It was clear that Tsuzuki wanted nothing more than to get out of the office and spend time alone with his boyfriend.

"You aren't even doing your work and you're worried about what we're going to do after? You won't even be leaving here if you don't finish."

"That didn't answer my question."

The younger man sighed. "If you get your work done before it's time to leave, then we can go out. How does that sound?"

Tsuzuki gave a smile that made Hisoka hope he really did get all his work done on time. "You got it!" With Tsuzuki finally giving his attention to his job, Hisoka returned to doing his as well.

The rest of the day was uneventful. Hisoka still caught Tsuzuki glancing at him every once in a while, but, as he was actually getting his work done, Hisoka wasn't going to complain. Once the clock hit 5, Tsuzuki rushed to finish the rest of the paperwork he was doing. While getting ready to leave, Hisoka watched him scribble the last bit down, shaking his head. When that was done, he somewhat organized his stuff before getting up and turning to his partner.

"Ready to go?"

"Did you get all your work done?"

"Yep! So, can we go?"

Hisoka couldn't help but chuckle to himself. "Let's go then."

"So, I was thinking," Tsuzuki began, taking Hisoka's hand in his as they walked out the door, "we could get some sushi for dinner and eat in the park."

"You want to eat at the park?"

"Yeah. It's much nicer and cheaper than eating in a restaurant, and it's nice being outside at sunset. Oh, we should get a dessert too!"

"Sure, we can do that." While it sounded simple, that was sometimes the best way to go. Hisoka never was big on extravagance, and he appreciated the simple dates Tsuzuki would take him on. He enjoyed places that weren't crowded and noisy- the less people around, the better. Cheap dates were good as well- they didn't land Tsuzuki or himself in debt.

After getting some sushi and, of course, an apple pie, the two shinigami made their way to the park. Tsuzuki found a spot under a cherry tree, sat down, and patted the ground next to him. "Right here is good!"

"The blossoms from the tree are going to get in the food."

"So we can just pick them off if they do."

Deciding not to argue, Hisoka sat down and laid the sushi out between them. It was mostly silent as they ate- something that, though rare for Tsuzuki, Hisoka had found sometimes even he found it peaceful enough to not have to talk. After having a few bites of his own, Tsuzuki held out a piece of sushi to Hisoka. The younger blushed as he took a bite. Smiling, Tsuzuki fed him another piece before turning his attention back to his own food.

"Mm, that was good. Time for dessert!" The sweet-toothed Shinigami announced once he had finished eating his sushi, wasting no time in reaching for the apple pie.

"Hold on." Hisoka grabbed a napkin, leaned over and wiped a grain of rice from the corner of Tsuzuki's mouth. "How do you always manage to make some sort of a mess eating?"

Tsuzuki simply shrugged and proceeded to cut pieces of the pie. After cutting one piece and handing it to Hisoka, he cut a larger piece for himself, put the rest of the pie and plastic knife aside, and began enjoying his dessert.

"Asato, you have almost a third of that pie in front of you."

"But it's a small pie, so it's not really that big of a piece!"

"That's still enough for two people."

"Nah. It's just right for me!"

Despite his larger piece, Tsuzuki still managed to finish eating first. He put his plate and fork to the side and laid on his back, resting his head in Hisoka's lap.

"I'm still eating."

"I don't mind. I'll catch any crumbs that fall."

Hisoka shook his head. "You're so weird."

"But you love me."

"Somehow." The younger man teased. He took a piece of his pie and held his fork out to Tsuzuki, who happily accepted the bite of pie. Once the dessert was finished, Hisoka put their empty plates and utensils into a bag and turned his attention back to the one laying in his lap.

"So, is this really all you wanted to do today?" Hisoka asked, stroking Tsuzuki's hair.

"Mhmm. I just wanted to spend some time with you, and I thought since it was such a nice day, we could have a picnic."

"It was a good choice."

Tsuzuki looked up at his partner and smiled. It wasn't often that he got to see his partner so relaxed, though, lately, it was becoming more common. Hisoka wasn't quite so tense during the day, and the time he spent outside of work with Tsuzuki generally left him feeling very calm and relaxed. It was something Tsuzuki was very happy to see. Reaching up, he brushed his fingers across his partner's cheek. Hisoka gave a soft smile that made Tsuzuki's stomach flutter. He sat up and pressed his lips to that of his younger partner's. Hisoka didn't hesitate to return the kiss. Wrapping his arms around Tsuzuki's neck, he let their emotions wash over him. There were no walls between them- both shinigami no longer had anything to hide from the other. The empath no longer tried to keep them separate either, letting their emotions mingle together until he couldn't tell the difference between himself and Tsuzuki.

As their kiss deepened, Hisoka let himself fall back onto the grass, Tsuzuki falling with him. His older partner's weight was warm and comfortable, making him feel safe and protected, as being near Tsuzuki always did. Even after they pulled apart, Hisoka kept his arms around Tsuzuki, holding him there.

Tsuzuki smiled, his face hovering inches away from Hisoka's. "You know, for being so shy normally, you have your moments."

Placing his hands on Tsuzuki's shoulders, Hisoka pushed his partner off of him, rolling with him until he had the older man pinned beneath him. "I'm not shy."

"Yes you are. You blush all the time."

"Do not." The younger protesting, cheeks turning pink in contradiction to his argument.

"You are right now. It's okay, I think it's cute."

The fact he was indeed blushing coupled with the compliment only made Hisoka blush more. "Shut up."

"See? Adorable!"

Deciding to make Tsuzuki stop talking before he turned as red as a cherry, Hisoka leaned down, kissing him and effectively cutting off any further conversation. Wrapping his arms around Hisoka, Tsuzuki held the smaller man against him.

While Hisoka wasn't normally one for any sort of physical contact- much less something intimate- he'd begun to accept it more after he started dating his partner. Despite thinking he didn't need it, the complete lack of it for his whole life- and afterlife- until that point had led to him seeking it through their relationship. Though he usually wouldn't openly admit he wanted the physical contact, Tsuzuki knew, and was more than happy to provide it. They had to take it slow, but, gradually, Hisoka was getting over his fears and was coming to realize he wanted the various affections Tsuzuki loved to give. Occasionally, Hisoka would even be the one to provide them, being the one to initiate a kiss, or reach out and take Tsuzuki's hand as they walked together. Each time made Tsuzuki happy, turning it into another moment, however brief, that the two shared.

Slowly, Hisoka pulled away, repositioning himself so that he was laying against his partner, head resting on his shoulder with an arm draped around him. He closed his eyes with a gentle sigh as Tsuzuki held him.

"I love you, Hisoka."

"I love you too, Asato."

They laid there in silence, happy just being in each other's arms. Had they not been outside, they likely would have fallen asleep like that- both of them feeling safe and somewhere they belonged. It wasn't until the sun had set that Hisoka decided it was time to go.

"I think it's time we get going." The younger man said as he sat up, much to his partner's dismay.

"Do we have to?"

"Unless you want to sit out in the cold all night long. I, for one, prefer my warm bed."

With a sigh, Tsuzuki got up, grabbing the bag with the leftover pie as Hisoka went to throw away their trash in the nearest trashcan. "I'll walk you home."

Together, they left the park hand-in-hand. It was a simple gesture, yet one that meant more to them than words could express, for it was the simple, every-day things they did for each other that showed how much they really cared.


	16. Baking Lesson

_**Summary:** Kannuki tries to give Tsuzuki a lesson in baking a cake, but can he manage to make even a simple cake out of a pre-made mix?  
_

_**Rating:** K+  
_

_**Genre:** Humor_

_**Characters:** Tsuzuki Asato, Kannuki Wakaba  
_

_**Words:** 1,239  
_

_**Author's Note:** This spawned from a conversation with Naotoki Yamanouchi while we were baking a cake, so thanks to her for inspiration for this!_

* * *

"Alright, Tsuzuki, let's get started!" Kannuki's cheery voice chirped as Tsuzuki finished tying an apron around himself. "Today we'll make a simple chocolate cake. In fact, it's so simple, we aren't even going to do it from scratch- we are going to make it out of a cake mix. You really can't go wrong like this." Though she preferred making all her baked goods from scratch, such a task for Tsuzuki's first cooking class was a bit too much, and she feared what may happen to her carefully perfected recipes should they try. Boxed cake mix was much safer- the directions were all right there, and, with her around, there was really nothing he could do wrong. At least, Kannuki didn't think so. Most others would probably disagree.

Tsuzuki grinned. "Okay! What first?"

"Well, we need to put the cake mix, some vegetable oil, water, and eggs all into a large bowl. Here are the exact ingredients we need." She held the box out to him, pointing to the side panel where the ingredients were clearly listed. "Get those things. Not anything more, not anything less. Don't stray from the recipe."

"Got it!"

Kannuki watched as the man fluttered about the kitchen at work, gathering the ingredients and tools he needed to make his cake. It was taking longer than necessary, simply because he kept stopping to look at other ingredients that might have tasted good with the cake.

"Can't we add other things too?" Tsuzuki asked after gathering the only three ingredients they needed, feeling it wasn't enough.

"Well, you could. If you wanted to add more flavor, you could add nuts or chocolate chips, or some flavoring. For example, if you like minty chocolate, you could add some peppermint extract to give the cake a little minty flavor."

"So why can't we do that?"

Kannuki sighed. "Because for now we are practicing on making a simple, plain chocolate cake. It's your first lesson, so we have to start with the basics. Now, read the directions and do exactly as they say."

Slightly disappointed that they couldn't add more, but still excited about taking baking lessons from the person he deemed the best baker in the world, Tsuzuki began following the directions on the box, step-by-step, exactly as they were written. Once everything had been correctly measured out and added, he began stirring the batter.

"Good! Keep doing that until it's all evenly mixed and there's no powder left. I'm going to find a pan to bake it in."

As Kannuki hopped off to find a cake pan, Tsuzuki's attention began to wander to other ingredients in the kitchen. She _did_ say it was okay to add other things to give the cake more flavor, so maybe he could sneak a little something in. Sifting through the stuff in the kitchen, Tsuzuki came across a small, unmarked bottle. Curious, he unscrewed the cap and sniffed it. The smell was not unpleasant- it had a fruity sort of scent to it, like a citrus. Fruit and chocolate went good together, so why not mix a little of that in?

Deciding he shouldn't use too much, Tsuzuki filled a tablespoon with the clear liquid and dumped it into the batter. Next thing he knew, both he and his surroundings were covered in chocolate cake batter.

Hearing a noise akin to a small explosion, Kannuki turned around, fearing what may have happened. She gasped as she saw chocolate covering everything. "Tsuzuki! How did you make cake batter explode?"

"I don't know! I just wanted to add a little bit of extra flavor to the cake, so I dumped in a tablespoon of this fruity smelling stuff, and it exploded!"

There was a heavy sigh as Kannuki brought her hand to her forehead. "Tsuzuki, I told you not to add extra ingredients. Though that still doesn't explain how it exploded. What did you put in it?"

Tsuzuki handed her the unmarked bottle, letting her inspect it, though she too looked confused as to what it contained.

"Odd. It doesn't look like anything abnormal..."

Hearing the commotion, Tatsumi (who was always among the last to leave the building after work hours) peeked in to see what was going on. Upon seeing the mess, he turned to Tsuzuki with a smile that was anything but friendly.

"Tsuzuki-san...what happened?"

"T-Tatsumi!" Tsuzuki stammered, knowing he was in trouble. "I, uh...well, I wanted to add something to the cake mix, so I poured a little bit of this in, and it just exploded!"

The secretary stared for a moment, walked up to the two baking, took the unmarked bottle, examined it, then gently put it back down. The seemingly uncaring way he did all of this unnerved Tsuzuki. "I see. Tsuzuki-san, I'm sure Kannuki told you not to add unnecessary ingredients?"

"Well, she did, but-"

"And you did it anyway?"

"Yes." Tsuzuki looked down, his expression similar to a puppy that had just been caught doing something wrong.

"Well then, you are to clean this entire mess up. Hold on, I'll get you something to clean it with. Kannuki, I don't want you to touch anything- Tsuzuki-san will clean all of this up. In fact, you may go home."

Tsuzuki watched as Tatsumi left the room. Kannuki looked from the doorway, to Tsuzuki, back to the doorway, then back to Tsuzuki, unsure of what to do. She didn't want to leave him alone with Tatsumi, as she did feel sort of bad for him- who would have thought adding a little flavor would have cause the mix to explode? "I can help you clean."

Tsuzuki's expression brightened. "Really?"

"Mhmm. After all, you didn't know that would happen."

"That wont' be necessary, Kannuki." Tatsumi's voice interrupted. "He still did something he was strictly told not to, so, even if he didn't expect that outcome, it's still his fault and he's still cleaning it up. You've worked hard today, you should go home."

"Well...alright..." She glanced up at Tsuzuki with an apologetic look. "Sorry, Tsuzuki. We'll try again another time. I do have to get home- truth be told, Hajime isn't a very good cook either. He doesn't exactly have the patience to prepare anything...or wait for it to cook the right way when he's hungry." She suddenly looked worried. "Oh dear, I hope our kitchen hasn't caught fire..."

Watching what little hope he had run out the door, Tsuzuki turned pitifully to Tatsumi. The secretary smiled and held up what he had deemed an appropriate tool to clean with. "Here you are, Tsuzuki-san."

"A-a toothbrush? But, Tatsumi, that will take forever!"

"You'd better get cleaning then. I want this place sparkling when you are done."

Tsuzuki pouted. "But it wasn't even sparkling when I started!"

"Well, it will be soon, won't it? Now, I have to get going home myself. It's about time for dinner. As for Watari, who I know that bottle belonged to, I'll take care of him tomorrow." He clapped Tsuzuki on the back. "I do hope you get time to eat tonight. See you tomorrow, Tsuzuki-san."

Tsuzuki held the toothbrush, whimpering as he watched Tatsumi walk out the door. It was going to be a long night.


	17. Music, Love, and Sake

_**Summary:** Tsuzuki wants to celebrate his first weekend living with Hisoka, but things start to get out of hand when he has a little too much sake.  
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_**Rating:** T  
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_**Genre:** Humor/Romance_

_**Characters:** Tsuzuki Asato, Kurosaki Hisoka  
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_**Words:** 2,242  
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_**Author's Note:** This was a request from a friend of mine, who wanted me to write a one-shot of Tsuzuki trying to seduce Hisoka while completely drunk. The song mentioned in this fic, This Is Love, belongs to Utada Hikaru from her Ultra Blue album. None of the lyrics are used in the fic. The song sounded like something Tsuzuki would enjoy, being so upbeat and happy. While it started out as just humor, it did get a little mushy in the end, and I hope Hisoka isn't too out of character. Hope you enjoy!  
_

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It was seven o' clock on a Friday evening, and Tsuzuki was excited for the coming weekend. There was no special event, just the fact he didn't have work for two days and they had no case to work on in the meantime, but that was enough reason for him to be in a good mood. That, and it was his first full weekend living with Hisoka.

After a while of visiting each other's home's and spending the night, the couple had finally decided to get a house together. Not only was it more convenient, but it was better for the both of them financially as well.

The two had gone out for dinner after work, and were relaxing for the evening. Hisoka had decided to read for a bit and was curled up on the couch under a blanket with a book. Tsuzuki, however, was in too much of a good mood to just sit around. He had been working on prepping his new garden (which had previously been nothing but dry dirt), but, once it got dark, he'd gone back inside. Since he was in such a good mood and thought that their first full weekend together should be celebrated, he popped out a bottle of sake and started pouring himself some drinks. He knew better than to offer any to Hisoka- the eternal teen had absolutely no tolerance for alcohol, especially something strong like sake.

Figuring he'd let Hisoka read a little while longer, Tsuzuki turned on some music just loud enough for him to hear, booted up the laptop and started to play some computer games, the sake beside him. Several minutes and shots later, he was having a hard time sitting still. While he didn't want to bother Hisoka, who was adorable in his blanket cocoon with his face buried in a book and lost in his own little world, he was finding it harder to resist pulling him away from the book.

Before he could come to a decision, however, one of his favorite songs started playing- Utada Hikaru's This Is Love. It was such a happy sounding song, and he couldn't help but get up and dance to it. He turned the volume up and proceeded to sloppily dance around the living room.

Hisoka, who had been so engrossed in his book he had all but forgotten Tsuzuki was even there, began losing focus on his reading. He tried blocking it out, but the music, combined with the joy Tsuzuki was unknowingly broadcasting to the empath, was making it increasingly difficult to go back to reading. As he looked up to scold Tsuzuki, he found himself at a sudden loss for words.

The older man was standing in the middle of the living room, unbuttoning his shirt and singing without shame.

"Ts-Tsuzuki! What the hell are you doing?"

"Hisoka! Isn't this such a great song?"

"Not the song, you idiot, your shirt!"

Tsuzuki shrugged. "It was getting hot. Besides, it's not like you've never seen me without a shirt before."

Hisoka felt his face grow increasingly warmer. "Th-That's not the point! You're prancing around like a stripper, cut it out!"

"Aw, don't act so put off by it."

One thing was suddenly very clear- Tsuzuki was drunk. Great.

"Get out of here and sober yourself up. I don't know how much you drank, but it's clearly affecting your better judgeme-" He didn't finish his sentence before he suddenly found Tsuzuki in his lap, far closer than he was comfortable with. "Ts-Tsuzuki!"

"Hi, Hisoka." Tsuzuki smiled, his face leaning closer to that of his partner's. "You know, you were adorable all wrapped-up in a blanket, reading on the couch."

"Get off of me, idiot! You reek of alcohol! Your breath alone could make somebody drunk!"

"But, Soka, you're comfy!" Tsuzuki said before he resumed singing along with This Is Love.

The blond was growing more and more uncomfortable with the man in his lap, especially as he started wiggling around in his attempt to dance to the happy pop song while singing horribly. Just as Hisoka was ready to try to wriggle away, Tsuzuki leaned in further and kissed him. Normally, Hisoka liked Tsuzuki's kisses, but the taste and smell of the alcohol on his breath was revolting.

"Don't kiss me, you taste like sake." Hisoka said, pulling away as much as was possible while sitting on the couch, which wasn't very far.

Tsuzuki pouted. "But, Hisoka!"

"No buts. This is why I hate it when you drink. Now get off of me."

"But, but, I don't wanna." Tsuzuki said before he began kissing the side of Hisoka's face instead.

"H-Hey! I said get off!"

"But you're so cute~" He giggled as he saw the blush on his partner's face. "Ugh, it's too hot." Before Hisoka could protest, Tsuzuki let his open shirt slide to the ground, leaving him with a now completely exposed upper half.

"Ts-Tsuzuki!" Whereas Hisoka had been annoyed before, it was now taking willpower not to admire Tsuzuki's physique, despite the man's drunken state, which only served to make him more overwhelmed than he was before. Then there was the fact Tsuzuki's emotions were all over the place and he was too out of it to even think about keeping them under control. There was slight annoyance at the fact it was, to Tsuzuki, inexplicably hot; the simple joy he had felt earlier which had been compounded by the alcohol to turn it into ridiculous excitement; and a sense of adoration for the person he cared so much for, which, to the empath's horror, was tinted with a steadily growing lust. Yep, Hisoka hated alcohol.

"What? Come on, you can't tell me it's not warm in here. Aren't you hot?"

While it was getting unnecessarily warm, it wasn't because of the temperature of the room. Embarrassment had Hisoka's face red and he felt warm from the uncomfortableness of the entire situation. Plus, Tsuzuki was quite literally on top of him, the physical closeness only adding to the heat. Of course, he wasn't about to admit any of that despite the fact it was quite easy to see the warmth in his face. "It's not hot in here, it's just you."

Tsuzuki stared for a moment, then smirked. "Hisoka, I didn't know you felt like that."

It took a couple of seconds for Hisoka to realize what Tsuzuki was talking about. "No, idiot! I mean you just feel like you're hot because you're drunk! That wasn't a pickup line!"

"Oh." Tsuzuki frowned. It didn't last long, however, as he was quickly smirking again. "Well, I think you're hot."

The temperature rose a couple degrees as Hisoka blushed even more. "Knock it off! Stop letting the sake talk!"

"It's not from the alcohol, I'm being honest! Please don't be mad. I really mean it 'cause I love you!" Tsuzuki whimpered and hugged Hisoka.

While it was obvious Tsuzuki had lost most of not all of his inhibition, Hisoka could tell he was at least trying to be nice. "I won't be mad if you stop acting like a drunken fool and get ahold of yourself. That, or just go to bed."

"I'm sorry. Do you still love me?"

Hisoka sighed. Now he was just getting emotional. "Yes, I still love you."

"Yay!" He left more kisses on his partner's cheek. "You're so nice! I love you, Soka! You're the best partner ever!"

Tsuzuki continued kissing Hisoka's face and neck. At first, the younger man figured he'd let Tsuzuki get it out of his system and then the older man finally leave him alone. Unfortunately, that didn't seem to be the case. The kisses didn't stop. Hisoka was about to say something when he felt Tsuzuki's hands slide under the blanket that was still draped over Hisoka's legs and start fumbling with the button on his jeans.

"Tsuzuki! Okay, that's it!" Hisoka grabbed Tsuzuki's hands, pulling them away from his pants. He couldn't take this anymore. As he pushed the older man away from him, Tsuzuki wobbled and fell to the floor.

"I'm alright!" The drunken man announced as he got back up off the floor and settled on the couch.

"I'm going outside. Don't follow me."

Hisoka didn't even stick around to listen to any whining from Tsuzuki. He marched out the door, settling outside where it was much cooler and nobody was around to bother him so he could take a breather and calm down. Why did Tsuzuki have to drink that stuff? Alcohol made people act crazy. Even if they were dating, that was no excuse to act so inappropriately. It made him uncomfortable, and he doubted he'd ever get used to it. As much as he wanted to avoid Tsuzuki, however, he felt a little bad walking out on him. He couldn't stay away for too long. Who knows what Tsuzuki would attempt to do if Hisoka didn't go back in soon? The drunk man definitely needed somebody to watch him and tell him when enough is enough.

Once he'd composed himself enough to deal with his intoxicated partner, Hisoka headed back inside. He was greeted not to apologies and hugs as he thought he'd be, but instead to snoring. Tsuzuki was passed out on the couch.

Shaking his head, the younger man pulled the blanket he had previously been using up over Tsuzuki. He grabbed his book and headed to bed, where he read until he fell asleep.

-xxxxxxxxxxxxx-

When Hisoka awoke the next morning, Tsuzuki was by his side, fast asleep. He figured the man must have woken up sometime during the night and moved into bed, though he was still wearing his work pants. Apparently he'd been too tired to change. Trying not to disturb his partner, Hisoka sat up, stretched, then slid out of bed. He figured Tsuzuki would still be out for a while, but, before he got in the shower, Tsuzuki began to stir. He groaned and pulled a pillow up over his head.

"Not feeling too good, are you?" Hisoka asked.

"Noooo." Tsuzuki moaned from beneath the pillow.

Hisoka sighed. "Hold on, I'll get you something." A short moment later, he was handing Tsuzuki a glass of orange juice and some ibuprofen. "Take this."

Slowly, Tsuzuki sat up, took the pill, and drank the juice. He was about to stop halfway, but Hisoka insisted he finish the whole thing.

"This is why I tell you to be careful when you drink." Hisoka said as he sat down on the bed.

Tsuzuki frowned and laid his head in Hisoka's lap. "I thought I was being careful. I didn't mean to drink that much, I just wanted a little buzz."

"I'm going to start hiding the alcohol and watching when you drink. You get out of hand."

"I made you uncomfortable, didn't I?"

"A bit."

"I'm sorry... Was I bad?" Tsuzuki honestly couldn't remember everything. He did recall sitting in Hisoka's lap, which couldn't have ended well.

Hisoka's cheeks turned red. "It was only a little annoying...until you tried unbuttoning my pants..."

Though the last part was mumbled, Tsuzuki had still heard what was said. "I did?" He knew that must have been awkward. He smirked at a thought, however. "You didn't seem to mind it a few days ago."

Hisoka shot him a glare, but then averted his gaze and mumbled, "You didn't reek of alcohol a few days ago."

"Fair enough. Joking aside, I'm sorry I made you feel awkward."

With a sigh, Hisoka looked back to his parter. "Just don't do it again."

"I'll pay more attention to how much I'm drinking next time. I just wanted to celebrate a little since it's our first full weekend living together."

"Really? That's why?"

"I know it doesn't sound like much, but I thought it was special. It seems I messed it up though..." He was regretting his decision to drink more and more. What kind of person started a special weekend making his partner uncomfortable? They were supposed to be enjoying their time together.

The younger man gently stroked his partner's hair. "The weekend only just began. We can try again."

Tsuzuki glanced up at Hisoka with a hopeful look. "Really?"

"Mhmm. Just...no alcohol next time. You're far more tolerable when you aren't attempting to drunkenly sing and dance. You're also much more charming when you have control over yourself."

"Did you just call me charming?"

"Maybe."

The purple-eyed man smiled. "I didn't know you thought I was charming."

Hisoka leaned down and kissed his partner. "Now you do." He repositioned himself to be beside Tsuzuki and brought their lips back together, fingers gently stroking the side of Tsuzuki's face. The older man wrapped his arms around him and returned the kiss, glad he was apparently forgiven for his actions the night before.

"You know, in celebration of our first weekend together," Hisoka said after pulling away from Tsuzuki just far enough to talk, "I'll let you sleep in today."

"That sounds nice, but, instead of sleeping, can we just be lazy and stay in bed for a little while?"

Hisoka raised an eyebrow. "You're giving up the chance to sleep longer?"

"Only if you'll stay with me. I want to be awake to spend more time with you."

"That might not be such a bad idea."

The space between them closed again, and Tsuzuki decided that the weekend would be wonderful after all.


End file.
